"The Hair has returned! You are our only hope, Granly! Save us!"
Gnary stood up immediately. The class stared in bewilderment, and his teacher politely asked him "just what the **** do you think you're doing?!" Gnarly didn't hear them. All he heard now were the voices, calling to him.
"My people need me... the Hair has returned!" he announced, before ripping off his uniform Superman-style to reveal his superhero costume underneath. "Goodbye, my friends," he said one last time before flying upwards and putting a massive hole in the roof that would undoubtedly cost $5,000 to repair.
He kept flying away until he reached the Island in the Sky, his homeworld that was first mentioned in Issue #24 or something. The Islandarians (****ty name for a ****ty comic) told him what had happened: Lord Matteomax of the British Army was doing British things, and now he had unleashed the Hair.
Gnarly stopped abruptly. Something smelled bad... "holy mother of God, what is that horrific smell?" he asked. "That... is the Hair," replied an Islandarian. "We do not know where it is located." "Fear not! For I, Gnarly of the Islandarians, shall save you from this British abomination!"
He used his Sky-senses to detect the source of the smell. It was coming from his house. As he opened the door to his room, the stench became unmistakable. The Hair was in this room. And there it was - right on the floor in front of him was the Hair, with its' signature poop dot on the tip of it.
He knew what he must do. "I'm sorry, but I fear I must make a sacrifice for the greater good. It is the only way to destroy the Hair for good," he said to the Islandarians who were staring in horror. "No, Gnarly-sama, you can't! You are too important!" "...I must. Avert your gaze, for this will not be pretty."
And with that, Gnarly then proceeded to (WARNING: highly disturbing content)
pick up the Hair and eat it, poop dot and all, in a single bite.
darkspyro
net