Top left then clockwise
Edgy bro 1 - Justicar Aatrox, because classic is a tiny bit too edgy.
Pokemon champion waifu - Cynthia, I'll never forget how you ****stomped me all the way back in diamond.
God King - Raidriar I'll be your servant any day...
Edgy bro 2 - *insert something about controlling your inner darkness which sounds cool in your head but just makes everyone laugh* Riku, DDD outfit is best.
Crazy dragon slaying/riding warrior - Dagur the deranged, I just wished you had gotten your glorious Skrill...
Robot lord - ALL HAIL LORD STARSCREAM! RULER OF THE DECIPTICONS!
Witch Mistress - Master Cyclonus, I really wish they didn't cancel the fourth season...
Demonic world ender Lord Nixilis! I shall serve you for all eternity...
Queen of the shadows - We've been through so much ****, deactivated lasers with, wait no, that's not it...
Heart stealer - Dark bum, you steal my life, but keep me alive...
Perfect Warrior - Oh Galacta, it's always a pleasure doing battle.
Ice Alien - Rundas, you were anything but cold hearted RIP
Me - I mean Bowser, I mean, ah forget it...
TFW you're not gay, but most of your Waifu's are male. Whoops...