darkSpyro

Well first I saw Sausage Party and I don't know what I think about that movie. Not good things.

Afterwards I saw Nerve because it was a school night so why not stay up till 3am watching movies. I really liked that one. It was really interesting and as a teenager I feel like I really related to it

Now You See Me 2- Wasn't really good. It had some really cool tricks and likable characters but that's really about it. The story isn't really compelling or interesting enough to really justify this sequel existing. 4/10.

The Angry Birds Movie- Here's the thing. I love animation. It's probably my favorite genre when it comes to film. Some of my all time favorite movies are animated movies.

The Angry Birds Movie made me want to hate animation.

This is probably going to top my list of the worst movies of 2016. Not only is this movie predictable and boring to watch, not only does it have terrible and annoying characters, not only does it have terrible, unfunny writing, not only is it yet another video game movie that absolutely sucks, but it is EXCEPTIONALLY uncomfortable to watch. Some of the jokes are so out of line and unexpected. It's one thing to have some subtle adult humor in your kids film, but Angry Birds takes it to a whole new level. This movie is supposed to be for kids, right? So why did I have to cringe at some of the more disgusting things that happen in this movie like the lake scene and why did I have to get wide-eyed at scenes unironically making a Fifty Shades of Grey joke? It's one thing to have these kinds of jokes, but it's another thing to have jokes with this magnitude AND have them delivered in the worst way possible. Not to mention the numerous pop culture references and mid-2000s memes they reference that will make this movie completely dated and irrelevant in like 2 years.

1/10. The only redeeming thing about the movie is the animation itself. But that doesn't really matter when the movie surrounding such colorful animation is garbage.

Dr. No.

It was about what I expected. Not bad.
I'm probably going to watch through the entire Bond franchise this month so expect more of these posts, or probably just a big one at the end.

I also saw The Adventures of Prince Achmed in film class, which was certainly a trip, if not a little boring (this is not my kind of plot). Released in 1926, it's the oldest surviving feature length animated film in existence, and those of you interested in animated films (especially with more unique styles of animation) should check it out.

Tron.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2- Okay at best. I did laugh at some points and I like seeing these characters and cast again, but there are times where nothing of any real interest happens and there are a lot of subplots that don't get any proper attention. It's a passable sequel. 5/10.

Norm of the North- WHY DID I DO THIS TO MYSELF

WHY

I THOUGHT ANGRY BIRDS WAS BAD, BUT THIS

THIS MOVIE ACTUALLY MADE ME FEEL DUMBER

I THINK I ACTUALLY LOST SOME INTELLIGENCE WATCHING IT

I mean... it's exactly what you'd expect. Atrocious animation, godawful jokes, inconsistent and confusing writing, annoying characters, it's just all around worse than awful. 0/10.

Storks.

Chatterbox
garfield is probably the better movie about a talking pussy

Shin Gojira

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Mockingjay Part 2

Brave Story. It was a wild ride... I honestly love it, I never heard people talk about this movie at all.

Quote: CAV

Dr. No.

It was about what I expected. Not bad.
I'm probably going to watch through the entire Bond franchise this month so expect more of these posts, or probably just a big one at the end.

Can't wait. I recommend watching them in chronological order. If so, you're in for a treat with From Russia With Love, the second bond film. The first 6 are all stellar. I'd love to see what you have to say for them, I'm a pretty big Bond fanatic.

Quote: CAV

Shin Gojira

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I am so jealous aaaaaaa

HOW WAS IT

Quote: Badwolfmichael

Can't wait. I recommend watching them in chronological order. If so, you're in for a treat with From Russia With Love, the second bond film. The first 6 are all stellar. I'd love to see what you have to say for them, I'm a pretty big Bond fanatic.

That was always the plan. I'm about halfway through FRWL but I tend to only get to watch it when on the subway and that **** is loud.

Quote: IsisStormDragon

Quote: CAV

Shin Gojira

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I am so jealous aaaaaaa

HOW WAS IT

Excellent in so many ways. It starts off fairly goofy looking but by the halfway point I was fully into it. Dialogue can be a little confusing at times since it's a lot of political and scientific jargon (majority of the film is higher offices trying to respond to the threat) and it's fired at you a mile a minute, but you're able to really get into it, and the points where it actually takes a breath, albeit rare, are nice.
There was one point in particular that sent absolute chills through me in a way a film hasn't really done in a good while. Honestly made me well up.

I haven't seen every Godzilla film just yet, but it ranks up there among the best I've seen; perhaps better than even the original in some ways? Certainly beats the 2014 American film (though that's not saying it's bad).

Also I won't say much but this Godzilla is very much a product of today in the same way the original was a product of its time.

Akira. I like it, but I don't get all the hype for it.

The Accountant- It was alright. Ben Affleck and Anna Kendrick give excellent performances, but the film is very inconsistent with its narrative and storytelling and there are a lot of subplots that don't always connect. 6/10.

The Wedding Singer

the magnificent seven

i liked it far more than the last one (since the "original" in itself wasnt actually the original story), and chris pratt and denzel washington did an absolutely fantastic job

Doctor Strange

Pretty standard for a MCU production writing-wise, not very intriguing to me. But the visuals are indeed quite trippy and spectacular. If you enjoy movies with creative visuals, you will probably enjoy this one.

Pete's Dragon 2016.

Well, with the original movie it could only go up. But...

Jack Reacher: Never Go Back- honestly pretty bad. I love Tom Cruise but even he wasn't enough to save this movie. Huge disappointment. 4/10.

Doctor Strange- Pretty good. I don't think it's as good as all the hype it's gotten but it's still a really great movie. 8/10.

Fantastical Beasts and Where to Find Them - loved it. I haven't touched HP since the third movie(school setting never clicked with me), and the same universe with different structure is just what I wanted. A bit goofy but sometimes movies that take themselves seriously at the weirdest situations are welcome.

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them- pretty good. Loved some of the new characters and I loved returning to the HP world after five long years. There are a lot of problems with the pacing and some with the story but other than that I really liked it. 7/10.

Barbarella
this may be the most baffling movie i've ever seen

Quote: Carmelita Fox

Barbarella
this may be the most baffling movie i've ever seen

I read Barbella and was deeply confused as to how that's related to movies.

I've never read it. But the movie was just WEIRD, man. It's almost like a complete encompassment of the late 1960s /early 70s — free love, idealistic visions of a peaceful utopia, trippy visuals, and uh ... extremely softcore porn.

Rush Hour 2 (2001)
Bamui Yeowang (2013)

Moana- Really freakin' good. Amazing animation, great characters, a fun story, and an astoundingly fantastic soundtrack. I'm still humming and singing a lot of songs from this movie. 9/10.

Moana. Not a bad film but I've the song 'Shiny' stuck in my head. It's probably what I'll sing if I ever find a shiny Pokemon.
Before that Fantastic Beasts. I wasn't expecting much but I ended up enjoying it.

finished se7en
just **** me up fam

Scrooged. It was a pretty funny take on Christmas Carol. Bill Murray is Bill Murray and I love me some Bill Murray. Only real complaint is that Christmas Present is weird and annoying. She's like a fairy godmother type character and she constantly giggles like a weirdo. It got on my nerves. Other than that, it's a great film.

7/10

Big Hero 6.

Assassin's Creed- All I can say is... dammit. They screwed it up. Colossal disappointment, but I honestly shouldn't be surprised. The story is incredibly flawed, hard to follow, and all over the place, the characters are really wooden despite Michael Fassbender really trying in this movie, the movie focuses on a lot of modern day crap even though that's ALWAYS been the weakest part of the games(I'd go as far as to say the Desmond storyline is better. How do you even do that?), and it's littered with bad editing and camerawork. The best parts of the movie were the scenes in the past, but they happen so rarely and so fast that they can't really make much of an impact. And it really sucks, because if this movie had just the stuff from the past and nothing else, I would have no doubt that this movie would be MILES better than it is. Just about everything in the past is great: the visuals, the sound, the music, and the stuntwork(which, side note, is some of the BEST stuntwork I've ever seen in a movie). The only bad thing about the past sequences are the characters, because there isn't really any character to them at all. Better then the really wooden and bland characters in the modern day segments without a doubt, but still not much to them at all.

3/10. This is not the one to break the videogame movie curse unfortunately. Very disappointed.

^Not an Assassin's Creed fan, but I was hoping the movie would break the curse. Shame to hear it's not good.

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Last movie I watched was Arrival.

Rogue One.

Ho-lee ****.

As someone who never touched the now-non-canon expanded universe, if you told me when I binge watched the series almost a decade ago that the things in this plot would happen, I'd laugh at you because even Episode III is too optimistic for that.

Moana. I love the giant crab's song, "Shiny."

A Madea Christmas

So very boring. The writing kept smacking you over the head with obvious exposition, and a vitally important detail for one of the character's motives and feelings isn't revealed until the final half hour (in an exposition dump, naturally). They had an interesting idea in a black woman being racist towards whites that feels offset by splintering in a subplot involving a white racist (which absolutely feels forced since that little story arc only shows up like three times before the end).
And it's barely about Christmas after the first 20 minutes are over.

Larry the Cable Guy isn't funny in this (no I'm not familiar with his material outside Cars) and the drama is astoundingly boring and badly written. Madea herself (himself?) is funny every now and then as she always is, but she's barely ever in the film to help offset the painful attempts at social commentary and family drama.

So it's your standard Madea film (at least of the few I've seen). Amusing when the titular character is on screen, but all too often bypasses her in favor of ****ty TV drama.

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.

The Emperor's New Groove
The jokes still hold up really well today. It's rare that we get a movie that is both good and a meme, but Disney did it just right. 9.5/10

Batman Returns

I really enjoyed this movie. Danny Devito is perfect as Penguin, Batman is Batman and Christopher Walken plays a good antagonist of sorts. The only thing that bothers me is Catwoman. She weirds me out majorly and her backstory isn't explained super well. All in all, great Batman film

8/10

Moana.

Rogue One

It was alright. In some ways better than VII, if only because it actually tries something new rather than tread old ground. That said, it definitely should've been darker, and the music didn't fit many scenes.

Supposedly Disney ordered reshoots for the film before release, and it was suspected it could've been to make it more light hearted and akin to other Star Wars films. I can't help but feel now like that may have been what hurt it.

Die Hard

It's like Home Alone 3, but with Duke Nukem

Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children.

I bet the books are great. The movie is not. I takes about an hour to get the exposition out and the plot going, the characters are one-note and don't contribute to the quirkiness, and it shoves in the romance WAY earlier before we even care about what's happening(amplified by said bad characters so you're expected to find it romantic before you even find it relatable), and some of the special effects are either unecessary, fake looking, or both. Sorry Tim Burton, but at least Alice in Wonderland had the art style to entertain; I walked out of the room at the halfway point (watching it with roomates at home).

The Angry Birds Movie

Surprisingly enjoyable. It had its issues, but it was fun the whole way through. Pretty visuals, a good bunch of good jokes (and a couple bad ones too) and a decent plot and writing, at least in my opinion.

La La Land- THIS MOVIE IS PHENOMENAL. GO SEE IT. 15/10.

Quote: pankakesparx456

La La Land- THIS MOVIE IS PHENOMENAL. GO SEE IT. 15/10.

All this hype it's getting is raising my expectations to unreasonable levels and then when I see it I'm going to be let down so hard.

America 3000
this movie was written by incels