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darkSpyro - Spyro and Skylanders Forum > Stuff and Nonsense > Personal Thoughts
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Personal Thoughts [STICKY]
Mesuxelf Ripto Gems: 3666
#30151 Posted: 07:19:58 31/05/2015
Nooooo stoooop. I went to bed at 9:00, and fell asleep at 12:000. Then, I wake up at 3:00 and can't get to sleep. My sleeping medicines don't work smilie
Riolu-Blue-247 Diamond Sparx Gems: 8843
#30152 Posted: 07:52:30 31/05/2015
I wish i was medicated out of my mind, then i wouldn't have to be me. I wish i could just stop talking because my voice is such a terrible sound to me. I wish I could fade away because it would be easier for everyone. I wish I didn't have to be in this house. I wish I could see Him... because I don't know how long I can hold on.


Thanks mum... I tell you I cant learn or focus at school and that Im going to fail and you say, "well... just buckle down and you will pass"
that... your advice sucks
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I just realised that I might not know what the hell is going on
whirlwind fan Platinum Sparx Gems: 5841
#30153 Posted: 08:14:27 31/05/2015
I need to release my anger. I'm getting mad at everyone for the most tiniest things. I just want to smash something, I need to punch something, I need to release this anger. Errr, ****ing hell. ****ing hell. I feel unstable and broken in so many ways, I don't know why, I just need to be alone.


Error.
TorchSheep Emerald Sparx Gems: 3376
#30154 Posted: 08:20:26 31/05/2015
The dinosaurs, I have now been here before them.
Finally, Emerald Sparx! ;U;
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"I have my own system, don't get involved"
huge dotd freak Emerald Sparx Gems: 3354
#30155 Posted: 12:21:34 31/05/2015
If. I will probably never meet you or speak to you, ever. That's reality, no changing it. However, if I were to, it's not that I wouldn't want to, more that I'd be...scared? Like, what if you don't like me. What if the movies, tv shows I watch, video games I play, music I listen to, my hobbies, my opinions, what if you hate me for them? And would you even want to to try to get to know each other?I know that you know I exist, you may not know where, or much about me, same goes for me and you, heck i dont even know your age! But you know. Do you care? Do you even want to meet, ever? Do you know that you're the thing I think about when I get up and when go to bed? I kinda stalk you online, btw, because I wanted, needed, to know what you look like. And what we did ever meet, what I say? What do you say to someone you've never met, no nothing about, but in life, this person should practically be your best friend. I dunno...
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Do you not like my mouth words?
Jaggedstar Diamond Sparx Gems: 8578
#30156 Posted: 12:33:53 31/05/2015
I forgot how much I love darkspyro tbh
---
Quote: Paytawn
oh my god
Mesuxelf Ripto Gems: 3666
#30157 Posted: 12:42:23 31/05/2015
Quote: Jaggedstar
I forgot how much I love darkspyro tbh



You came back because you missed me. Admit it.
Jaggedstar Diamond Sparx Gems: 8578
#30158 Posted: 12:45:16 31/05/2015
Quote: Mesuxelf
Quote: Jaggedstar
I forgot how much I love darkspyro tbh



You came back because you missed me. Admit it.



hate to break ur heart but i missed dark girl<3
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Quote: Paytawn
oh my god
Mesuxelf Ripto Gems: 3666
#30159 Posted: 12:48:03 31/05/2015
Quote: Jaggedstar
Quote: Mesuxelf
Quote: Jaggedstar
I forgot how much I love darkspyro tbh



You came back because you missed me. Admit it.



hate to break ur heart but i missed dark girl<3



Shhhh no need to lie.
Jaggedstar Diamond Sparx Gems: 8578
#30160 Posted: 13:27:43 31/05/2015
Quote: Mesuxelf
Quote: Jaggedstar
Quote: Mesuxelf



You came back because you missed me. Admit it.



hate to break ur heart but i missed dark girl<3



Shhhh no need to lie.



shhhh she'll hear you
---
Quote: Paytawn
oh my god
Riku-sempai Platinum Sparx Gems: 5795
#30161 Posted: 16:11:56 31/05/2015
I really have changed, hub? But I don't think its for the best, honestly. Over the past, I've hurt so many people, lied so many times, and for what? It was all for nothing.. I just have more people hating me then ever before. But that isn't the change, I've become less trusting, more cold to people in general, just more shut in and just pushing people further and further away. These days, I'd much rather be in my room, doing what I usually do, talking on skype and scrolling through the internet, instead of seeing my friends. I just don't feel welcome anymore, or trusted, or.. Anything, really. I just don't feel like I belong with anyone, like I don't really matter that much anyway.

I'm sick, I'm tired, I'm stressed. But I don't know if that's affecting me or not.

But hey, as long as I have you, what else really matters? Right now, you're the only thing that's properly keeping me together.
---
Hesitant Captain, it's too late to turn back around. The party is waiting and leaving this earth is such a beautiful sound.
Lunarz Emerald Sparx Gems: 3498
#30162 Posted: 20:16:23 31/05/2015
I ****ing hate my teeth, ****ing gaps everywhere, my ears are ****ing huge, my nose is big.

I am ugly, I hate it, I hate being ugly. Sure, I look kind of alright when I'm straight faced but I feel like I'm just ugly. I'm so self conscious about my looks. **** genetics.

I get it, it's vain, but I want to be hot. I just want to be hot so then a girl will like me for once. I just want happiness and love.

I look awful in pictures, maybe that's it...Maybe I'm in denial...

But I have acne everywhere, I have an undesirable body, just...Ugh, I ****ing hate this..

-----
---
Lanky Kong saved me despite having no style nor grace.
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 20:29:15 31/05/2015 by Lunarz
spyroisthebest8 Gold Sparx Gems: 2939
#30163 Posted: 20:21:51 31/05/2015
And I could write a song, a hundred miles long, well that's where I belong, and you belong with me. The streets your walking on, a thousand houses long, well that's where I belong, and you belong with me. Ah what good is it to live with nothing left to give? Forget but not forgive, not loving all you see. Ah the streets you're walking on, a thousand houses long, well that's where I belong, and you belong with me, not swallowed in the sea. You belong with me, not swallowed in the sea.~


Song lyrics, that kinda stuff
AvatariDragon Platinum Sparx Gems: 6242
#30164 Posted: 20:38:37 31/05/2015
I'm beginning to question y'all's parenting skills and techniques, honestly. You haven't been awful parents, but you could have been better.

Maybe the reason why I'm so uptight is because y'all were so strict? I used to look like an idiot and still do sometimes because I've been so sheltered and don't know certain things or I'm not as "street smart" as I maybe should be. My sisters and I never "let loose" and "have fun" because whenever we do y'all just laugh and make a big deal out of it like it's a joke or a show. Same with when we're around little kids. We don't know what to say or how to behave because we were never exposed to them all that much, so whenever one is around y'all always laugh and coo at the "cute" awkwardness when it's not an enjoyable experience at all.

And I don't know why you in particular always have to criticize everything. You're seriously gonna berate my sister for not eating her dinner "properly"? How about she eats how she wants, what the **** does it matter? Or how you're always putting her down and treating her like she's stupid. No wonder she feels bad about herself and doesn't feel like she'll be successful. And then you're always picking on and starting arguments with my other sister for the stupidest ****ing ****. And then you treat me like a ****ing princess who is still a child in your eyes, apparently. I already have my problems to deal with and you manage to pinpoint them and turn it into a joke or something. "You should leave your hair like that!" "Rubbing those eyebrows again!" And the fact that you were bugging us to actually say awful words like that? **** off.

And then you smoke fifty million damn cigarettes a day, most of the time it's inside the house. No wonder I have asthma now. We all probably have nasty lungs. And you always doubt me when I say something is wrong, and it turns out there is. "It's 'cause you always stay locked up in your room." "It's just stress." "You're not eating right." Asthma. Probable migraines. Need birth control. Yeah, it's because I'm always inside. Okay.

I love you guys, but seriously?


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Lunarz Emerald Sparx Gems: 3498
#30165 Posted: 21:13:23 31/05/2015
****ing honestly?
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Lanky Kong saved me despite having no style nor grace.
Riolu-Blue-247 Diamond Sparx Gems: 8843
#30166 Posted: 22:08:55 31/05/2015
Sometimes I wonder if you think of me and miss me... probably not heh...
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I just realised that I might not know what the hell is going on
Lunarz Emerald Sparx Gems: 3498
#30167 Posted: 23:13:12 31/05/2015
Why don't you respond to my pm's? Do you hate me? Did I do something wrong? I just want to talk to you again...
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Lanky Kong saved me despite having no style nor grace.
huge dotd freak Emerald Sparx Gems: 3354
#30168 Posted: 23:23:42 31/05/2015
Hey, does anyone know if Purple N Spyro is still here?
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Do you not like my mouth words?
thumper Ripto Gems: 3519
#30169 Posted: 23:40:11 31/05/2015
Ya'll can stop anytime now, k? smilie
AmethystRose Yellow Sparx Gems: 1132
#30170 Posted: 04:43:23 01/06/2015
I am sooo gonna sleep all day tomorrow. But I know I can't...
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ϟ Break my heart, break me til I fall apart. ϟ
MoonHorizons Gold Sparx Gems: 2826
#30171 Posted: 05:33:27 01/06/2015
why am i up at this time?

i have stuff to finish up tomorrow.
---
the more obscure your favorite cartoons are, the more refined your taste is
AvatariDragon Platinum Sparx Gems: 6242
#30172 Posted: 14:41:11 01/06/2015
I suppose this is just a taste of what life will be like later. Might as well get used to it. *sigh*


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AmethystRose Yellow Sparx Gems: 1132
#30173 Posted: 19:18:02 01/06/2015
Time to get this started.
---
ϟ Break my heart, break me til I fall apart. ϟ
Mesuxelf Ripto Gems: 3666
#30174 Posted: 19:18:59 01/06/2015
I know no one cares, but I've been trying to gain weight, and I've reached the point where I can no longer wrap my hand around the thinnest part of my ankle and have my fingers touch.


- - -
huge dotd freak Emerald Sparx Gems: 3354
#30175 Posted: 21:56:26 01/06/2015
I'm done. I pick out the hair color I choose, everyone is all cool until it says it's permanent, not fade out. Yeah, well , it my hair, it can be whatever color I want
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Do you not like my mouth words?
Lunarz Emerald Sparx Gems: 3498
#30176 Posted: 23:37:50 01/06/2015
Quote: Cynderfan507
Hey nobody's treated me like **** on this chatzy yet!



Let me in and I'll bully you hehehehe
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Lanky Kong saved me despite having no style nor grace.
Lunarz Emerald Sparx Gems: 3498
#30177 Posted: 23:47:45 01/06/2015
Quote: Cynderfan507
Quote: Lunarz
Quote: Cynderfan507
Hey nobody's treated me like **** on this chatzy yet!



Let me in and I'll bully you hehehehe


cries


too bad I can't, your room is full and it's actually pissing me off omf
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Lanky Kong saved me despite having no style nor grace.
Lunarz Emerald Sparx Gems: 3498
#30178 Posted: 03:47:28 02/06/2015
k but I love you tho
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Lanky Kong saved me despite having no style nor grace.
Riolu-Blue-247 Diamond Sparx Gems: 8843
#30179 Posted: 04:15:30 02/06/2015
It hurts having never met some of the people closest to my heart
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I just realised that I might not know what the hell is going on
thumper Ripto Gems: 3519
#30180 Posted: 04:28:38 02/06/2015
While the cat was away, the mouse did play. hmm...
AvatariDragon Platinum Sparx Gems: 6242
#30181 Posted: 04:32:50 02/06/2015
I wish soul transplants were a thing. I just want a new body, honestly.

---

Wow, I actually finished a video. I had almost forgotten what that satisfaction felt like. And what makes it better is that I'm actually kinda happy with how it turned out smilie


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Trix Master 100 Diamond Sparx Gems: 8324
#30182 Posted: 04:51:47 02/06/2015
Today has been crazy, first the senior breakfast having to be constantly restocked. Then winning a medal for outstanding performance in my art class. Followed by trying on the cap and gown and walking around the school (Desert + having clothes under the gown = too hot for anyone). To playing some video games with a friend that always wanted to hang with me (I think she's mind blown about Skylanders). Then to having some drama over my sibling wanting to use my ps3 for youtube, even when I told her multiple times no. Especially when she has her damned phone about it.

But overall, I think this was a relatively good day.
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If you cannot handle me at my pumpkin spiciest, you do not deserve me at my pumpkin sweetest
icon from Empoh
Riku-sempai Platinum Sparx Gems: 5795
#30183 Posted: 11:39:14 02/06/2015
Ya'see, this is why i'm an idiot, because I **** up once, then i'm like 'oh let me **** up some more' until it all becomes one cluster****.
---
Hesitant Captain, it's too late to turn back around. The party is waiting and leaving this earth is such a beautiful sound.
thumper Ripto Gems: 3519
#30184 Posted: 13:16:54 02/06/2015
I didn't sleep too good, this morning I have the shakes and I feel like I need to throw up. But hey I can handle it, not. I need my Mother, I'm hurt. smilie
AvatariDragon Platinum Sparx Gems: 6242
#30185 Posted: 15:54:16 02/06/2015
I don't know why I'm so worried about the audio, it's not like anyone will watch it anyway.


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parisruelz12 Diamond Sparx Gems: 7577
#30186 Posted: 16:22:59 02/06/2015
I understand that you want more kids, mom.

I just don't think It's that great of an idea, especially since this house is small enough as is. Seriously [my brothers] room, isn't even a bedroom to begin with, it was a study. Not meant to be a bedroom. AND you two are soooo instant on putting all the girls in one room. There's 3 of us in here now, 3! You couldn't a fit a 4th because it's too small. If you want a bigger family, then find a bigger house. But until, then, I don't know if I'm gonna stick around very much longer.

And Dad, I'm not living in a house that already has a family in it, It's too crowded as is, and I know you have dreams, but I'm going to be 18 in a little ess then 2 years now. It's not going to happen. This house was not meant for big family, it's a 1920's rambler. A starter home, in a ****ty neighborhood. I know that you want to keep this house in the family, and that it's hard to let go, but you really need to think about what more important to you, the building that holds the family or the family within. This house is holding you back.


My family never listens to what I have to say.
---
looks like ive got some things to do...
Darby Platinum Sparx Gems: 5750
#30187 Posted: 17:47:32 02/06/2015 | Topic Creator
good lord, get an actual life.
AvatariDragon Platinum Sparx Gems: 6242
#30188 Posted: 20:15:37 02/06/2015
Why is it so difficult for me to grow up? I feel so far behind compared to everyone else. Am I even going to make it?


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sonicbrawler182 Platinum Sparx Gems: 7105
#30189 Posted: 00:06:58 03/06/2015
Dunno why but this is leaving me with pits in my stomach. Haven't felt so anxious about something in a long while.
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"My memories will be part of the sky."
HeyitsHotDog Diamond Sparx Gems: 8924
#30190 Posted: 00:07:23 03/06/2015
Quote: AvatariDragon
Why is it so difficult for me to grow up? I feel so far behind compared to everyone else. Am I even going to make it?


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I can guarantee you, EVERYONE thinks this. Your not alone.
---
Hey is there anything you want me to bring for the rest of the week and if so it’s so cool that you can do something and just do it like that
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