darkSpyro

I'm sorry, I hope you all find the love and support you need. I'll be here to help out. We'll all help each other, that's what a community does.


It feels so strange, I feel closer to the LGBT community than I ever did with any Christian group.

Quote: torok

I'm sorry, I hope you all find the love and support you need. I'll be here to help out. We'll all help each other, that's what a community does.


It feels so strange, I feel closer to the LGBT community than I ever did with any Christian group.

I was never close to my peers (religion-wise) when I believed in God. I thought something was wrong with me because they all infused their religion into everything in their life and I was reluctant.

We'll this is a pleasant surprise and a plot twist indeed!
Apology accepted torok.

I forgive you and wish you luck!

Congrats! This is a wonderful surprise.

Um......whatever.

^You mean a pessimist?

What's wrong CAV?

Quote: Samius

I think what CAV means by that is that torok's choices are none of his business. I don't think he's trying to be rude or discouraging.

still not exactly the greatest thing to post on a topic like this
ech

I don't know what happened but you are forgiven and welcome to the community.

Quote: CAV

Um......whatever.

bro, if you really don't have anything to say besides "um whatever", its probably not worth posting here.

What I mean by what I say is more or less that this shouldn't really matter or be a big deal. Stuff like this isn't uncommon anymore and as society learns to suck it up it probably shouldn't be seen as some big event. This shouldn't be a game-changer either for the person or the people surrounding them (and especially not the people who seem to have a problem with it).
Only way I really see it making a huge difference is if the person in question then changes everything about themselves to fit the gender roles and stereotypes that many people in this community have come to criticize.

I dunno. I'm sorta just sick of the matter and "debate" and can't wait until the day where everybody just stops giving a ****. People are people. That's it. Why make a huge deal on either side anymore?

Sorry if my previous post looked to be offensive or a statement of disbelief.

I wasn't trying to make any of this a big deal. I was just trying to apologize for what I did in the past, that's all.

Wait what? torok made this topic?

Quote: somePerson

Wait what? torok made this topic?

Yes, yes I did.

I'm really proud to be in the LGBT community.

So am I.

Although I was gonna go to pride this weekend, but since there's a trans killer on the loose I rethought that...

In my house people make jokes about gays all the time, but there is no hostility toward them. But there are jokes and that's what angers me.

Quote: Cynderfan507

Quote: torok

So am I.

Although I was gonna go to pride this weekend, but since there's a trans killer on the loose I rethought that...

My aunt heard about some crazy **** that happens during gay pride. She was yelling at the top of her lungs "AND THESE DUMBASSES WONDER WHY EVERYONE MAKES FUN OF THEM AND HATES THEM!"
It scares the hell out of me whenever someone in my family says things like that...

Yeah... I know how you feel... I have anxiety, so I tend to get nervous really easily.

I just realized that I'm actually part of this "group" I didn't really think of it like that before. (And no I'm not technically gay)

Apparently my mom doesn't favor gays getting married. That's gonna be a problem...

Well, that depends, do you feel you're going to need to rely on your parents in the future?

For the next few years, yes.

Hmm, then I don't know what to suggest.

One of my friends said for me to tell her when I move out and get a job.

That's what I was suggesting. Or just Elope. And later say, oh, by the way, I'm married, to a man. And see what they say.

I doubt I can have the courage to elope.

As a Christian myself, I want to say congratulations on finding out who you are on the inside Things like this can be both hard and the journey long, but everyone has to take them in the end.

Honestly, its sad to think you have let go of your faith. Christianity is above all a faith of love and acceptance, and you cannot blame the Bible for how people have twisted that. It is my greatest aim in life to change this mentality, particularly America to represent exactly those two elements of Christ - love and acceptance. Always know, no matter who you are, true Christians will love you as a person.

I wish you the best Torok, and I genuinely do hope you regain your faith

Thank you BFE and AB.

I randomly popped on this site again and this is the first topic I see. I am thoroughly surprised. There's no way I'd leave without congratulating torok on this. Glad you've found your path, torok. Ultimately I hope it'll eventually put yourself at ease.

Good for you

I know we never really knew each other that well, but this still surprises me. You've made a good change and we're all proud of you! Sorry that Christianity seemed so poisonous that you had to leave it. People like that drive me crazy.


Also sorry for bringing up an older post, but really? There is (was?) a trans killer on the loose? Jeez, I seriously don't understand people's problem with the LBGT community. That just makes me sad and mad.

Quote: DarkCynder10

I seriously don't understand people's problem with the LBGT community. That just makes me sad and mad.

One major issue is shame. Some people will cite various -isms, but it's really shame. The first thing we have to understand is the way we, as human beings, think. We are hard-wired to fear those that are different from us. Someone who's different from us could kill us, steal our women, steal or food, etc. People who aren't our family may consume our resources. The inherent flaw is we assign a negative connotation to these various -isms; sexism, racism, etc. It's not the -ism thats bad, but how we react to these hard wired impulses. We laugh at jokes that marginalize a variety of people.

Any behavior against what is perceived as the "norm" triggers our us-versus-them and our -isms. Now, I'm not saying the LGBTQ community is 'abnormal,' but that is the majority consensus in white, christian america. Just as interracial marriages were taboo. Children don't understand these inherent -isms and hatred - We, as a society, tech it to them. Some communities are more tolerant than others. Some families are more accepting than others. When a person sympathizes with someone different, we clash with our intellectual self and our hard-wired animal self. Shame is the result. Shame that we're somehow no longer ourselves or that our belief system is flawed. And let me tell you something you don't need a degree in Human behavior to understand: We will fight and claw against an attack on our beliefs; against our shame.

Now what we as a society need is empathy. We need empathy to understand the struggle for equality the LGBTQ community faces. After all, it parallels the challenges the equal rights movements had. But, we also need empathy to the same people the LGBTQ community struggles against. We have to understand the veil of ignorance and privilege. We have to understand that some of the hate really is a learned behavior. And any learned behavior can be unlearned.

I grew up in the 90s where a person could literally be beaten to death for even the suspicion of being gay. I was even pulled aside by authority figures advising me to 'stop playing with the colored girl.' I learned these -isms. I learned to distrust and hate people different from me. But, and this is what fills me with hope for the future, I changed. I got me some empathy. I'll never be perfect - the stereotypes creep in all the time. But, I try to overcome my nurture; my nature; my preconceived notions; my learned behaviors.

I'm confident the LGBTQ community will overcome the bigotry and hatred, just as civil rights pioneers did. Unfortunately, it takes time. I believe we'll see it in my lifetime.