Today was alright, I guess. Not the best day ever, but still. Now I have that stupid maths homework to do and that fluff in the water bottle..*throws up again* ewwwwwww
He talks about me with his stupid friend and he grabs my long hair... All I can do is hit him in the nuts which I did repeatedly but he took no affect I mean does he have anything down there?
How have I gotten myself into this?
What happens if they find out?
This just plain old isn't right...
yet it is to me somehow
But I wonder, I wonder
Just what could happen
If it all comes crashing down....
Cause I just feel like I"'m lying to myself,
But There's just no turning back now
Cause I'm standing! At a crossroads!
No static goal in sight,
But I cannot go on like this,
Hiding in shame, fear and fright
Cause I'm standing! At a crossroads!
Nowhere left to go,
I have to make my mind up now
Because I walk a lonely road.
Damn. My problems make good songs...I should write this somewhere!
SERIOUSLY?!? You guys really pushed the envelope this time! You freaking insult me because of a hobby a site I go to that is now practically my second home, because my first one just doesn't feel like home anymore? That's pathetic. And to think, that at a time in the past, I considered you bastards friends. Some friends you turned out to be.
I want to carve and draw into the blue with a knife...
Not my own veins, but you...
Father, my dear father, I've outplayed your sick, twisted game...I'm out of your grasp...But not my younger brothers...
I am violent...I am insane...
And I can't stop...The sweet red rain that I imagine in my mind...
Heh heh...Eh heh heh heh!
But...One part still makes me human...These strings hold me back...The faith that stays, a fire...Not a flame of hate or anger...It's not black...It's too bright for that...
The part of me in pain...To see such part of me insane...
I'll stay strong, I know my Soul is stained, that part of my mind is black...but...I can push it back...I know I can...
I won't hate you, I know that the part of me that's insane...Is my faults...Is apart of me...That I have to bare...I'll accept and work with you...To make me better...
If you hear this, my infectious black, then know that I won't be on the attack...You are me, and I am you...Together we are both parts of a whole...Apart of one body...Share one Soul...The door is open, the gate is unlocked, I know if I reject you, I'll only become more separated, feed the insanity...
The whole me, is the true me...I'm not afraid of you, if you take me over, then you'll find it impossible, because this is also a part of who I am...Every part of me cannot die...Only make a whole...
I'm not letting the Darkness win, I'm just accepting and letting you in, because you...Are...Apart...Of...Me...Too...
--- Like fallen snow, I lay on the ground and wait for my turn to fade away, no matter how unique I seem. It's my gift to you... A true sacrifice...
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 03:42:55 23/01/2014 by Dark Lord
In real life, I'm a good person, with good intentions, help those in need, sometimes naughty, and as a person, I'm not perfect and I make mistakes. I like the happiness, the fun, this life, live with my family, well, not much, but at least it's better than living alone, have fun with my friends, either in real life and on the internet, meet new people as well as new stuff and so, have a good life.
In some nightmares I dream that I'm a complete psycho, kills people, seeing blood, view and run a slow death to feel the pain and suffering of the victim, burn many things, be like a cold murderer, and so horrifying things, perhaps with very few fears, but in general, the opposite of being a good person.
What is happening to my subconscious?
Obviously, I will never be so, do not be afraid of me. Even, sometimes I have fear of myself.
I'm sorry about Chatzy. Sky and I were jerks and I apologize. If you don't accept the apology, that will be alright, it just feels wrong to not apologize. I feel I'm turning more and more of a troll. ;~;
Another Chatzy-related apology from a while ago.
NINJAsk too, I know this was from a while ago, but I'm sorry about the choosing game on Chatzy and everything else. It's alright if you don't forgive, though.
There: is the opposite of Here. It means “in that place” not here There we go.
Let's go there
They went there Their: is a possessive adjective which is used before a noun. It shows possession, that something belongs to them. Their toy Their house Their cat They're: Combination of "they" and "are" They're moving They're crazy They're insane Your: Possessive
That is your apple.
That is your toy. You're: Combination of "you" and "are"; describing someone You're crazy You're smart
Now use these correctly before I beat your face in with your keyboard~
ah **** **** why do these have to happen I just want to roll over and give up what the hell government whawtagvjbmnmkf ijPHAL:NK>Fokjihbvgee why why why
First, I want to thank everyone whose offered me support during this **** time I'm going through. I couldn't be more grateful.
Now for today's rant. Get your popcorn ready, people.
My partners in cookery treat me like a servant. They don't even let me help. "Elisia, clean the worktop for us!" "Elisia, wash these up!" "You're doing it wrong!" "There's nothing you can do so go sit down or something." There was LOADS I could've done. And I don't mind cleaning, but I DO mind it when you guys don't take turns and order me around like I'm a lower class than you.
Today in PE, I cried AGAIN. And why? Well, it's my 14th birthday TOMORROW and my mum isn't gonna be here. And the group were leaving me out. Is there something about me that's so unlikable? Eh, probably.
I hate acting happy at-well, I'm not gonna call it home. THAT PLACE. Because then questions will be asked, or I'll just be told to go to my room for being a sullen brat. Fine by me.
If you don't let me call mum tonight, I'll just go up to a phone box with your money. You spent zillions calling your daughter from HK to England and now you're not letting me have ten minutes a week?! The duration of our phone call was 5 minutes. That was last Sunday. You may think that at this age I'll be more independent and not need my mum but it's been a solid 7 years since we got torn apart. THINK ABOUT MY FEELINGS FOR ONCE YOU HEARTLESS WITCH.
First, I want to thank everyone whose offered me support during this **** time I'm going through. I couldn't be more grateful.
Now for today's rant. Get your popcorn ready, people.
My partners in cookery treat me like a servant. They don't even let me help. "Elisia, clean the worktop for us!" "Elisia, wash these up!" "You're doing it wrong!" "There's nothing you can do so go sit down or something." There was LOADS I could've done. And I don't mind cleaning, but I DO mind it when you guys don't take turns and order me around like I'm a lower class than you.
Today in PE, I cried AGAIN. And why? Well, it's my 14th birthday TOMORROW and my mum isn't gonna be here. And the group were leaving me out. Is there something about me that's so unlikable? Eh, probably.
I hate acting happy at-well, I'm not gonna call it home. THAT PLACE. Because then questions will be asked, or I'll just be told to go to my room for being a sullen brat. Fine by me.
If you don't let me call mum tonight, I'll just go up to a phone box with your money. You spent zillions calling your daughter from HK to England and now you're not letting me have ten minutes a week?! The duration of our phone call was 5 minutes. That was last Sunday. You may think that at this age I'll be more independent and not need my mum but it's been a solid 7 years since we got torn apart. THINK ABOUT MY FEELINGS FOR ONCE YOU HEARTLESS WITCH.
I feel bad for venting
It's all gonna all be OK soon. You just gotta believe.
(Also, Elisia? Pretty name :3 )
First, I want to thank everyone whose offered me support during this **** time I'm going through. I couldn't be more grateful.
Now for today's rant. Get your popcorn ready, people.
My partners in cookery treat me like a servant. They don't even let me help. "Elisia, clean the worktop for us!" "Elisia, wash these up!" "You're doing it wrong!" "There's nothing you can do so go sit down or something." There was LOADS I could've done. And I don't mind cleaning, but I DO mind it when you guys don't take turns and order me around like I'm a lower class than you.
Today in PE, I cried AGAIN. And why? Well, it's my 14th birthday TOMORROW and my mum isn't gonna be here. And the group were leaving me out. Is there something about me that's so unlikable? Eh, probably.
I hate acting happy at-well, I'm not gonna call it home. THAT PLACE. Because then questions will be asked, or I'll just be told to go to my room for being a sullen brat. Fine by me.
If you don't let me call mum tonight, I'll just go up to a phone box with your money. You spent zillions calling your daughter from HK to England and now you're not letting me have ten minutes a week?! The duration of our phone call was 5 minutes. That was last Sunday. You may think that at this age I'll be more independent and not need my mum but it's been a solid 7 years since we got torn apart. THINK ABOUT MY FEELINGS FOR ONCE YOU HEARTLESS WITCH.
I feel bad for venting
Aww, are you okay? Do you need someone to talk to? (Elisia? That's a pretty name)
First, I want to thank everyone whose offered me support during this **** time I'm going through. I couldn't be more grateful.
Now for today's rant. Get your popcorn ready, people. >_>
My partners in cookery treat me like a servant. They don't even let me help. "Elisia, clean the worktop for us!" "Elisia, wash these up!" "You're doing it wrong!" "There's nothing you can do so go sit down or something." There was LOADS I could've done. And I don't mind cleaning, but I DO mind it when you guys don't take turns and order me around like I'm a lower class than you.
Today in PE, I cried AGAIN. And why? Well, it's my 14th birthday TOMORROW and my mum isn't gonna be here. And the group were leaving me out. Is there something about me that's so unlikable? Eh, probably.
I hate acting happy at-well, I'm not gonna call it home. THAT PLACE. Because then questions will be asked, or I'll just be told to go to my room for being a sullen brat. Fine by me.
If you don't let me call mum tonight, I'll just go up to a phone box with your money. You spent zillions calling your daughter from HK to England and now you're not letting me have ten minutes a week?! The duration of our phone call was 5 minutes. That was last Sunday. You may think that at this age I'll be more independent and not need my mum but it's been a solid 7 years since we got torn apart. THINK ABOUT MY FEELINGS FOR ONCE YOU HEARTLESS WITCH.
I feel bad for venting >_<
*hugs* You can always spend your birthday with us. Hopefully you can call your mom sometime soon.
---
If you cannot handle me at my pumpkin spiciest, you do not deserve me at my pumpkin sweetest
icon from Empoh
I was sitting in the hall ready for school to start. The bell ranged and when I was walking down this 7th grader thought that he was funny and screamed "FOR NARNIA!" in my face. He he yelled he also spitted in my face.
I was sitting in the hall ready for school to start. The bell ringed and when I was walking down this 7th grader thought that he was funny and screamed "FOR NARNIA!" in my face. He he yelled he also spitted in my face.
First, I want to thank everyone whose offered me support during this **** time I'm going through. I couldn't be more grateful.
Now for today's rant. Get your popcorn ready, people.
My partners in cookery treat me like a servant. They don't even let me help. "Elisia, clean the worktop for us!" "Elisia, wash these up!" "You're doing it wrong!" "There's nothing you can do so go sit down or something." There was LOADS I could've done. And I don't mind cleaning, but I DO mind it when you guys don't take turns and order me around like I'm a lower class than you.
Today in PE, I cried AGAIN. And why? Well, it's my 14th birthday TOMORROW and my mum isn't gonna be here. And the group were leaving me out. Is there something about me that's so unlikable? Eh, probably.
I hate acting happy at-well, I'm not gonna call it home. THAT PLACE. Because then questions will be asked, or I'll just be told to go to my room for being a sullen brat. Fine by me.
If you don't let me call mum tonight, I'll just go up to a phone box with your money. You spent zillions calling your daughter from HK to England and now you're not letting me have ten minutes a week?! The duration of our phone call was 5 minutes. That was last Sunday. You may think that at this age I'll be more independent and not need my mum but it's been a solid 7 years since we got torn apart. THINK ABOUT MY FEELINGS FOR ONCE YOU HEARTLESS WITCH.
I feel bad for venting
Aww, are you okay? Do you need someone to talk to? (Elisia? That's a pretty name)
Well. I thought maybe my depression was getting better. I had done so well with not hurting myself all morning, but then PE came around. Since I almost cried, and I knew tears were forming, I had to use my nails and press on my skin even harder than usual just to stop. I almost pierced my skin because of it. If I hadn't gotten to Coach at the time I did, I would've been bleeding. I know things will be worse tomorrow. I'll probably either pierce my skin or break down sobbing. There's reasons I don''t like Spirit week. Games. I've always hated games that require skill. And now I'm forced to participate in them. Sometimes I just want to trip, fall, and crack my head open.
I was sitting in the hall ready for school to start. The bell ringed and when I was walking down this 7th grader thought that he was funny and screamed "FOR NARNIA!" in my face. He he yelled he also spitted in my face.
Well. I thought maybe my depression was getting better. I had done so well with not hurting myself all morning, but then PE came around. Since I almost cried, and I knew tears were forming, I had to use my nails and press on my skin even harder than usual just to stop. I almost pierced my skin because of it. If I hadn't gotten to Coach at the time I did, I would've been bleeding. I know things will be worse tomorrow. I'll probably either pierce my skin or break down sobbing. There's reasons I don''t like Spirit week. Games. I've always hated games that require skill. And now I'm forced to participate in them. Sometimes I just want to trip, fall, and crack my head open.
Are you okay? I can talk to you some more to help, if you want.
I don't wanna think about this meeting with the school I'm getting all jittery **** no this is NOT GOING TO RUIN MY WEEKEND please ow my head is burning