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darkSpyro - Spyro and Skylanders Forum > Stuff and Nonsense > Personal Thoughts
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Personal Thoughts [STICKY]
Skyhunter Diamond Sparx Gems: 9728
#42451 Posted: 16:48:47 09/08/2018
Look, I get it. I get that you don't want to get too hyped about something because there's a chance it might not turn out the way you hoped. I get it, we've all been there at some point. But there's a difference between not getting your hopes up so you're not as disappointed, and being a cynical little ***** that goes into things automatically assuming they're going to suck. And I'm not wrong just because I give the benefit of the doubt, and I'd really wish you'd stop trying to push your "everything sucks until proven otherwise" mindset on me.
---
"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want." -Calvin, Calvin and Hobbes
somePerson Diamond Sparx Gems: 9376
#42452 Posted: 18:20:11 09/08/2018
I don't know why but I've become super social after graduating high school
---
Star Wars didn't happen, but it's a rad movie.
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 19:21:49 09/08/2018 by somePerson
ClassicSpyroLUV Yellow Sparx Gems: 1193
#42453 Posted: 18:41:17 09/08/2018
Probably because high schoolers suck.
somePerson Diamond Sparx Gems: 9376
#42454 Posted: 19:22:20 09/08/2018
Quote: ClassicSpyroLUV
Probably because high schoolers suck.



yeah probably
---
Star Wars didn't happen, but it's a rad movie.
Grizzle Gold Sparx Gems: 2496
#42455 Posted: 21:03:35 09/08/2018
that ****ing hurts

why does everyone leave me i dont get it
Chompy-King257 Gold Sparx Gems: 2956
#42456 Posted: 00:55:41 10/08/2018
Sometimes I feel like the Enclave Communications Officer from Fallout 2
---
i made the "bus" look like my "dad"
willspyro Ripto Gems: 5862
#42457 Posted: 00:57:40 10/08/2018
Thighs are not on fire
Beemo Emerald Sparx Gems: 3427
#42458 Posted: 03:01:14 10/08/2018
Why can't I learn that other people's views on me don't matter?
terrafin2299 Ripto Gems: 3418
#42459 Posted: 07:21:13 10/08/2018
Why can I not let go of this site

I have no friends here anymore, and it's not like anyone talks to me, but why do I feel like I need to check in every once in a while? I can't cut this site out of my life and it's toxic.
somePerson Diamond Sparx Gems: 9376
#42460 Posted: 12:30:36 10/08/2018
im gonna try to not say retarded anymore and cut out autism jokes from my life
---
Star Wars didn't happen, but it's a rad movie.
wanderist Platinum Sparx Gems: 7090
#42461 Posted: 17:12:31 10/08/2018
Well. Time to start cursing about my school again because they suck at communication.
willspyro Ripto Gems: 5862
#42462 Posted: 07:02:31 11/08/2018
It seems that the transition from middle school to high school is successful. Just got to bypass the sophomore slump.
terrafin2299 Ripto Gems: 3418
#42463 Posted: 04:52:44 12/08/2018
He's dead.... I only met him once and I know he's better than anyone in the family. I still remember him asking me about college and talking about my dad. And he's gone. I'll miss you Uncle Ronnie

the fact most of those people are my friends in that topic and I'm on none of their favorite people on ds lists hurts a little
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 15:46:25 12/08/2018 by terrafin2299
Bolt Hunter Gems: 6267
#42464 Posted: 21:45:35 12/08/2018
these medications are messing with my head. im constantly tired, even more so than before, and i feel like my mind is in a daze. im avoiding going online now just to avoid negativity, i don't need to see that stuff right now. started reading again to get my mind off things, but i still can't get her out of my head. i worry and worry and worry that she hates me and never wants to talk to me again. i don't know if that's true, but it feels like it is.

am i a good person? do people want to speak to me? please ... i need some reassurance.
i think she's just too busy to reply and see me, but it doesn't stop my head from going to the conclusion that she hates me.
do you think she feels bad about missing lunch on thursday and hasn't replied because she feels guilty, or just doesn't want to see me again?

im starting to think i have more of a problem than just depression and anxiety. like, some sort of obsessive disorder or something.
god im never going to be able to have a proper relationship with anyone. im either always too overbearing and clingy, or too standoffish and distant.
screw me.
---
you don't know me. i break things
I draw stuff.
crystalhero37 Platinum Sparx Gems: 5752
#42465 Posted: 13:37:14 13/08/2018
Do you have any idea of what's coming out of your mouth.

- -

Well that settles it, you're awful people! smilie I have NO idea in how you guys think the way you do. Pure idiocy.

- -

looks like I'm never gonna be able to be myself and make myself feel comfortable just staying here, huh.


- - -
Bolt Hunter Gems: 6267
#42466 Posted: 18:23:04 13/08/2018
... I'm going to say something to her today!! I know it's risky, but some people are just worth the risk, especially when they are one of those rare people that make your heart glow!!
(but it's not romantic love, just very strong platonic love haha)
---
you don't know me. i break things
I draw stuff.
azz01 Emerald Sparx Gems: 3346
#42467 Posted: 19:20:57 13/08/2018
It's a really weird feeling, but this has been the happiest year of my life. I'm healthy and losing weight, my anxiety and depression aren't at me as much, I'm doing well in school and I'm just a for confident person in general. I feel like I could take on the world.
---
Call me the penguin man for that is who I am. Also stan LOOΠΔ!
Avatar by Trix Master
HeyitsHotDog Diamond Sparx Gems: 8866
#42468 Posted: 20:45:19 13/08/2018
Urg-urg-urg-urg-urg-urg-urg-urg-urg-urg-urghhhhh...
---
Hey is there anything you want me to bring for the rest of the week and if so it’s so cool that you can do something and just do it like that
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 20:45:40 13/08/2018 by HeyitsHotDog
King-Pen Krazy Yellow Sparx Gems: 1907
#42469 Posted: 22:42:23 13/08/2018
Okay, don't even pretend you do what you are asked, I am always asked to do work, it may be small amounts of work, but it's more than you've ever done in 4 years

So don't go acting like you have to do the work everytime, and that I'm a lazy *****, okay?
---
Rise and Shine Ursine
Bolt Hunter Gems: 6267
#42470 Posted: 07:07:08 14/08/2018
She loves me!!!!!!!!!!
---
you don't know me. i break things
I draw stuff.
Riolu-Blue-247 Diamond Sparx Gems: 8843
#42471 Posted: 08:29:29 14/08/2018
Health issues cause stress
Stress causes more health issues
Rinse and repeat
I don't know how much longer I can function like this
---
I just realised that I might not know what the hell is going on
King-Pen Krazy Yellow Sparx Gems: 1907
#42472 Posted: 12:33:50 14/08/2018
Quote: Bolt
She loves me!!!!!!!!!!



Hooray!!!
---
Rise and Shine Ursine
terrafin2299 Ripto Gems: 3418
#42473 Posted: 12:44:43 14/08/2018
Suddenly all those old feelings of wanting to die are flooding back. Maybe I should give in to them
Skyhunter Diamond Sparx Gems: 9728
#42474 Posted: 14:24:24 14/08/2018
****
****
****
****
****
****
****
****
****
****
****
****
---
"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want." -Calvin, Calvin and Hobbes
Grizzle Gold Sparx Gems: 2496
#42475 Posted: 01:06:56 15/08/2018
what's wrong with me i dont get it, what are the odds this happens twice, what am i doing wrong, am i just annoying, am i just unlikable, am i just unlovable, maybe im not meant to have friends, maybe im not meant to have love. god im so alone i have one person i even talk to, why are things like this
willspyro Ripto Gems: 5862
#42476 Posted: 04:39:02 15/08/2018
Wake me up when it's September
crystalhero37 Platinum Sparx Gems: 5752
#42477 Posted: 08:21:24 15/08/2018
hmmmmmmmmmmmmm wow i just want to disappear

- - -

i completely forgot that you didn't know that fact about me. so me talking about that stuff may have seemed bad and now i feel awful for it


woweeeee
Bolt Hunter Gems: 6267
#42478 Posted: 08:24:51 15/08/2018
For a long time in awhile ... I feel ... okay. Things will be okay. I'll get there. I have a big support network of family and friends. Everyone thinks I can go out and conquer the world, so why do I doubt myself?
I don't know if it's these new meds, but my heart feels light and swollen and ... I don't know ... full of love? I cherish everyone who has supported me, and everyone who loves me.
My head has been a mess these past few days getting used to the meds, and I barely remember anything. It's feels like a blur, to be honest.
But yeah, I've just been thinking about everyone who I love and care about and my heart just feels ready to explode. I just, love everyone. I want to hold everyone in my arms so tightly, and just, fall asleep with my face buried in their chest.

All you guys are amazing and I love you all.
---
you don't know me. i break things
I draw stuff.
ShadowMewX Diamond Sparx Gems: 8525
#42479 Posted: 21:42:27 15/08/2018
Is it bad I dread my music ensemble class more than my difficult science class at college? My parents' background is music, and my dad's got in contact with the cello teacher, and I'm super afraid that the professor's gonna have a super high expectation of me that I will be unable to fulfill because my skills are realy, really mediocre. I also worry that they're going to think my dad's a terrible musician because I'm not great and he's been the closest thing I've had to a teacher, even though my dad being bad is not the case; it's that I haven't had much consistent instruction. While on the other hand, not having science in my background in the slightest is gonna make me look super good if I do well in the class.


_____
---
Let's bust bunsen burners and bounce!
DeathOfADream Yellow Sparx Gems: 1510
#42480 Posted: 04:12:17 16/08/2018
It’s always in these moments where it becomes more and more evident what you think of me.
So thanks, I guess. For your complete lack of empathy, minimal understanding of mental health, and your extremely demanding and condescending attitudes. I legitimately thought I’d be happier here but as each month passes I realize, I’m not. I’m really not. And it’s been a year already. What a fool I was.
My own ****ing family. Goddamn. I always knew how dysfunctional this family was, but I expected it to get better as time went on. But I’m a fool for that too.

- - - - -

Your support means the world to me. I’ve been feeling so alone as of late. Thank you both for being so understanding, and not getting angry at me for being so anxious and paranoid.
It’s becoming easier to see who actually gives a **** about my wellbeing and who doesn’t. While the results are disheartening in a way, they’ve also given me much hope.
God bless you. Your kindness motivates me to do better. I don’t want your efforts to go to waste.
---
”I am not everything you thought that I would be
But every story I have told is part of me.”
Bolt Hunter Gems: 6267
#42481 Posted: 08:26:08 16/08/2018
You don't deserve this ... you're such a wonderful person. Why does this awful awful illness have to affect the best people. I wish I could do something to help. I wish I could do something to help everyone who suffers in their head.
No one deserves this. Everyone deserves to be happy.

I'm worried about you. I know you'll be alright, but I don't want to see you go through this.
---
you don't know me. i break things
I draw stuff.
parisruelz12 Diamond Sparx Gems: 7577
#42482 Posted: 23:04:52 16/08/2018
i!!! dont!!! want!! to!! work!! in!! customer!! service!!! anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
---
looks like ive got some things to do...
wanderist Platinum Sparx Gems: 7090
#42483 Posted: 05:36:37 17/08/2018
I know I'm tired and overly emotional, but jeez, you didn't have to say it like that. Now I just feel like crap and want to go back into hiding.


Oh well.
parisruelz12 Diamond Sparx Gems: 7577
#42484 Posted: 07:11:58 17/08/2018
dont have an anxeity attack over a game dont have an anxiety attack over a game
---
looks like ive got some things to do...
ShadowMewX Diamond Sparx Gems: 8525
#42485 Posted: 13:32:10 18/08/2018
First night of staying in my college dorm with my roommate and I get sick. JUST MY LUCK. My roommate's gonna think I'm gross and also I feel like garbage. ;~;

_____
---
Let's bust bunsen burners and bounce!
Skyhunter Diamond Sparx Gems: 9728
#42486 Posted: 02:54:54 19/08/2018
I've been having the same headache on and off for over a week now. I think I should have a doctor check that out.
---
"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want." -Calvin, Calvin and Hobbes
willspyro Ripto Gems: 5862
#42487 Posted: 18:22:04 19/08/2018
Wake me up when it's autumn
Bolt Hunter Gems: 6267
#42488 Posted: 18:41:54 19/08/2018
I'm sick of doctors appointments, man. All my weekends lately have been doctors and therapy and I'm so exhausted. And these new meds just make me sleep all the time. I'm sleeping like twelve hours a day. Apparently it's because my mind isn't worrying/overthinking so much all the time?
Don't have time to do anything anymore. Haven't been able to draw in two weeks (outside of schoolwork I mean).

But, I'm not upset about it. Just a little disappointed and frustrated.
Frustrated that all my time is now spent at the doctors, but I hope it's helping me to get better and that it doesn't have to last much longer.
At least I've been able to catch up on my reading.
---
you don't know me. i break things
I draw stuff.
Grizzle Gold Sparx Gems: 2496
#42489 Posted: 02:34:47 20/08/2018
god i wish i had more friends and people to talk to im so lonely, i have little to no friends. and it sucks because I know I'm really likable and people seem to think I'm funny but it's like, I dunno I don't do anything so I'm not doing myself any favors cuz how can i meet people if i dont do anything. It just sucks and also I feel like some people are leaving me and I don't know why and my luck has just been so terrible
ZapNorris Ripto Gems: 5109
#42490 Posted: 07:14:19 20/08/2018
i can be so much better than people..
Riolu-Blue-247 Diamond Sparx Gems: 8843
#42491 Posted: 09:42:34 20/08/2018
I'm stuck between being so proud of how far I've come and lamenting over how far I have to go. Everything is so much energy and its so had to keep that energy going.
Today was better. One day every day will be good.
---
I just realised that I might not know what the hell is going on
somePerson Diamond Sparx Gems: 9376
#42492 Posted: 13:11:29 20/08/2018
The problem with humans is that we always want to be right even when proved wrong
---
Star Wars didn't happen, but it's a rad movie.
Skyhunter Diamond Sparx Gems: 9728
#42493 Posted: 23:46:42 20/08/2018
"Don't worry about me"? Uh, dude. You have depression, have said multiple times that you self harm, and are so terrified of death that you rely on me to remind you that you're not going to die anytime soon at least three times a day. Give me one good reason I shouldn't worry about you.
---
"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want." -Calvin, Calvin and Hobbes
DeathOfADream Yellow Sparx Gems: 1510
#42494 Posted: 03:34:29 21/08/2018
There’s something really relaxing about sitting in the dark. Well... Not entirely in the dark. Maybe a couple dim lights shining from a hall or another room. Just being able to admire how calm and still and silent it is when no one else is around or awake.
And somehow the tears in my eyes are just as relaxing. I guess I’m just glad I’m even capable of crying anymore? It’s hard to do that these days. Unless it’s that time of the month... But that time’s already passed for now, so, this is a purely natural reaction. Finally.
---
”I am not everything you thought that I would be
But every story I have told is part of me.”
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 03:36:47 21/08/2018 by DeathOfADream
TheToyNerd Gold Sparx Gems: 2137
#42495 Posted: 03:50:23 21/08/2018
I’ve met so many cool people before college even starts for me. I’m ecstatic to see everyone in person and be best buds with some wicked awesome people
Bolt Hunter Gems: 6267
#42496 Posted: 07:44:49 21/08/2018
I. Don't. Want. To. Be. Awake. Anymore.
---
you don't know me. i break things
I draw stuff.
parisruelz12 Diamond Sparx Gems: 7577
#42497 Posted: 19:40:47 21/08/2018
aaannnnddd the mood is gone.

dont even know why i bothered haha
---
looks like ive got some things to do...
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