torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#1 Posted: 20:22:54 08/01/2010 | Topic Creator
i'm doing another fanfic...the fanfic is about a demon couple who takes their demon baby to Heaven and leaves him there for safety... first chapter coming today.
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Edited 1 time - Last edited at 21:03:24 08/01/2010 by torok
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Solister Gold Sparx Gems: 2478 |
#2 Posted: 21:37:59 08/01/2010
Sounds interesting
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Heavy: MEDIC! Medic: NO! |
darkfurydragon Emerald Sparx Gems: 3312 |
#3 Posted: 21:58:51 08/01/2010
Oh, wow. *has curious look*
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torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#4 Posted: 23:21:17 08/01/2010 | Topic Creator
Chapter 1,
2 demons were at the gates of Heaven, one of the demons was male and one was female. the male's name was Aym and the female's name was Lilith. Lilith held a baby in her arms and it was wrapped up in a blanket, only it's head was uncovered. Aym, Lilith and the baby were all dragon-like demons. Aym and Lilith had on black robes and they had hoods over their heads. Lilith held the baby protectively close to her. Aym: "are you ready to go?" Lilith: "Aym... i'm scared... what if we get killed?" Aym held Lilith's hand "it's going to be alright... just keep close to me." Aym and Lilith walked though Heaven's gates. it was night time. Aym: "we should hurry the sun is going to come up soon." they ran through Heaven, Lilith was holding onto Aym's hand as they were running. Lilith looked at the baby worriedly. Aym and Lilith stopped running. they could see the golden city in the distance. Lilith: "Aym we can't go into the city there's bound to be guards there..." Aym: "you're right..." Aym looked and saw the river of life, he walked over to it. Lilith followed him holding her son in her arms. Aym saw a basket and picked it up. Aym: "this is just big enough to hold him..." he put the basket in front of Lilith Lilith put the baby in the basket. she looked at him sadly and kissed him on the forehead. Lilith: "be safe my son..." the baby was asleep. Aym gently pushed the basket into the water and it floated in the direction of the golden city. Aym held Lilith's hand to comfort her as they watched the basket float away. Aym: "may God watch over him and spare him..." Aym and Lilith walked back to hell. Lilith: "do you think we did the right thing Aym?" Aym: "yes. our son doesn't deserve to live in hell..." they walked into hell. the basket continued floating down the river towards the golden city... next chapter is coming tomorrow. |
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 13:43:45 09/01/2010 by torok
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Solister Gold Sparx Gems: 2478 |
#5 Posted: 23:27:47 08/01/2010
Good first chapter
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Heavy: MEDIC! Medic: NO! |
darkfurydragon Emerald Sparx Gems: 3312 |
#6 Posted: 23:38:09 08/01/2010
Sounds rather like moses.
Nice job. |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#7 Posted: 00:14:28 09/01/2010 | Topic Creator
yeah thanks i couldn't think of another way to get the demon baby into Heaven.
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Edited 1 time - Last edited at 01:46:17 09/01/2010 by torok
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spyro super fan Emerald Sparx Gems: 3096 |
#8 Posted: 02:45:23 09/01/2010
that is inspired of a chapter in the bible, regarding moses
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Kiyoteru Hiyama - "You're engulfed in a sorrowful melody, come and sleep now. Hereafter, the beginning of a tragedy must be burned into your eyes." |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#9 Posted: 02:48:46 09/01/2010 | Topic Creator
yes it is, also because i had no idea of another way i could do the chapter.
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Observer Ripto Gems: 2225 |
#10 Posted: 13:14:26 09/01/2010
I wonder what will happen next...
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torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#11 Posted: 15:19:14 09/01/2010 | Topic Creator
you'll find out...
Chapter 2, the basket continued to float down the river, eventually it came to rest on the river bank. a few minutes later the sun came up. an angel that was paroling near the river saw the basket. he walks over to it and looks inside. angel: "it's a demon!" the angel took out his sword and was about to strike the baby. the baby woke up and saw the angel, the baby began to cry loudly. the angel didn't notice Jesus was standing right behind him. Jesus: "why do you pull out a weapon on a child?" the angel looks behind him and lowers his sword when he sees Jesus. angel: "Master that creature is an evil demon. it's our enemy..." Jesus: "it's only an infant... now put away your sword." angel: "...yes Master...." he put away his sword. Jesus: "go back to patrolling through Heaven." angel: "yes Master." he walks away. Jesus walks over to the basket and picks up the little demon inside. he holds him in his arms. the demon looks at him and stops crying. the little demon smiles at him. Jesus: "there that's better... looks like your parents have a lot of faith sending you up here...it's a pity they didn't stay... don't worry you'll be taken care of here..." he gently pets the demon. the demon giggles and smiles at him. Jesus walks toward the golden city with the demon cradled in his arms. as he walks through the city people see the demon baby in his arms and stare at it. Jesus walks inside the Temple and sits on his throne. he unwraps the demon from the blanket. the little demon looked like a dragon. Jesus made a white robe appear on the demon. Jesus made a little cross necklace. the cross was made out of diamond and written in gold letters was the demon's name 'Vepar'. Jesus put the necklace on Vepar. Jesus looked at Vepar and smiled petting him. Vepar: "...da-da..." Jesus: "oh... your first word... aren't you sweet..." Jesus petted Vepar... next chapter coming today or tomorrow. |
Solister Gold Sparx Gems: 2478 |
#12 Posted: 17:23:37 09/01/2010
Aww, good chapter
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Heavy: MEDIC! Medic: NO! |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#13 Posted: 17:24:42 09/01/2010 | Topic Creator
thanks.
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spyro super fan Emerald Sparx Gems: 3096 |
#14 Posted: 17:40:54 09/01/2010
tthat ngel seemed a little stupid, good chapter anyway
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Kiyoteru Hiyama - "You're engulfed in a sorrowful melody, come and sleep now. Hereafter, the beginning of a tragedy must be burned into your eyes." |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#15 Posted: 17:42:34 09/01/2010 | Topic Creator
what?
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spyro super fan Emerald Sparx Gems: 3096 |
#16 Posted: 17:46:00 09/01/2010
he was trying to strike a baby
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Kiyoteru Hiyama - "You're engulfed in a sorrowful melody, come and sleep now. Hereafter, the beginning of a tragedy must be burned into your eyes." |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#17 Posted: 17:58:48 09/01/2010 | Topic Creator
yes... i know.
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MinM20 Blue Sparx Gems: 543 |
#18 Posted: 19:29:43 09/01/2010
What does Vepar mean?
(If it has a meaning!) Very good chapter tho!
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I am as old as Budda, I am as young as Confusius~MniM You cannot escape from it. You chose your path, and that is the path you are destined to folow~MinM |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#19 Posted: 23:52:09 09/01/2010 | Topic Creator
i think Vepar is some sort of water demon.
but in my fanfic he's a dragon-like demon. Chapter 3, 4 years later Vepar grew into a playful young demon, he spent most of his time with Jesus. when he wasn't around Jesus Vepar would play with the animals that occasionally wandered around the Temple. Vepar didn't have any friends because no child wanted to be around him. Vepar questioned why nobody wanted to be around him, but he'd not let it bother him, but he wanted a friend. when people come to the Temple they'd always give Vepar weird looks as they passed by him, if families with children came to the Temple the parents always kept their children close while passing by Vepar. Jesus knew Vepar was lonely, he wanted to do something about it. he noticed Vepar was sitting in a corner of the Temple playing by himself again. Jesus walked over to Vepar. Vepar turned his head and looked at Jesus. Vepar: "what is it daddy?" Jesus: "Vepar come with me..." Vepar stood up, Jesus walked out of the Temple, Vepar walked with him holding onto his hand. they walked through the city. Vepar: "where are we going daddy?" Jesus: "we're going somewhere where you can make some friends..." they continued walking through the city hand in hand. next chapter coming tomorrow |
Cynder1 Yellow Sparx Gems: 1801 |
#20 Posted: 00:54:39 10/01/2010
Interesting. But he should grow up to be a teen first, having a hard time in hevan and everything, then that part whould come up...
But hey, its your story, not mine :3 Keep up the awsome work :3
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Yeet |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#21 Posted: 01:20:29 10/01/2010 | Topic Creator
thank you...
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Edited 1 time - Last edited at 02:50:24 10/01/2010 by torok
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ElectricDragons Ripto Gems: 1138 |
#22 Posted: 10:18:47 10/01/2010
What a sweet chapter.
And good chapter. |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#23 Posted: 14:40:34 10/01/2010 | Topic Creator
thanks.
Chapter 4, Jesus and Vepar walked through the city, they were approaching a large building, the building was 3 stories high, it had lots of windows. they walked through 2 golden double doors and got inside this building, the floors had golden tiles, there were golden lockers on either side of the walls. they walked through the building and approached another hallway, they walked through the hallway, there were lots of doors in this hallway, and on every door was someone's name, they stopped at a door. Jesus looks at Vepar. Jesus: "Vepar you'll spend a few hours here." Vepar: "how come daddy?" Jesus: "you'll have fun here, you'll make friends and you'll learn about lots of things." Jesus opens the door and Vepar sees a colorful room, there were drawings on the walls, there were shelves with lots of toys and picture books, there were tables at the front of the room with some chairs around them, there was an angel sitting at a desk. Jesus: "Dina..." the angel saw Jesus. Dina: "yes Master?" Jesus: "i have a new child for you to teach." Dina: "who is it?" Jesus: "him..." he points to Vepar. Dina: "he... he's a demon." Jesus: "yes... i want him treated fairly. do not leave him out of anything." Dina: "yes Master, i understand." Jesus looks at Vepar. Jesus: "there will be other children coming here too. you'll have fun and make some friends... i'll be back here in a few hours..." Jesus let go of Vepar's hand and started to walk away. he turned around and looked at Vepar. Vepar: "bye daddy." Jesus: "goodbye..." he waved at him and walked away. Vepar looked at Dina. Dina: "the other children will be here shortly... why don't you sit at a table and wait." Vepar sat down in a chair in front of a table and waited... next chapter coming today or tomorrow. |
Edited 2 times - Last edited at 17:24:24 10/01/2010 by torok
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spyro super fan Emerald Sparx Gems: 3096 |
#24 Posted: 16:23:54 10/01/2010
good story
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Kiyoteru Hiyama - "You're engulfed in a sorrowful melody, come and sleep now. Hereafter, the beginning of a tragedy must be burned into your eyes." |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#25 Posted: 16:26:14 10/01/2010 | Topic Creator
thanks.
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Solister Gold Sparx Gems: 2478 |
#26 Posted: 17:55:49 10/01/2010
Good chapters
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Heavy: MEDIC! Medic: NO! |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#27 Posted: 21:31:23 10/01/2010 | Topic Creator
thank you.
Chapter 5, a few minutes later some human children and some angel children walked in the room. they all sat down in the chairs at different tables. Vepar was sitting alone because no one wanted to sit with him. Dina got up from his desk and looked at everyone. Dina: "alright... i think we're missing someone." just then a little female angel opens the door and walks inside the room. angel: "sorry i'm late Mr. Dina." Dina: "no problem just find a seat hon." the angel looked around the room and saw Vepar sitting by himself, she walked over and sat down in a chair beside Vepar. angel: "hi, i'm Angie. what's your name?" Vepar looked at her shyly. Vepar: "my name is Vepar..." Angie: "that's a cute name." Vepar: "thank you..." Dina stood at the front of the room and addressed everyone. Dina: "alright now that everyone's here we can get started. you can socialize with each other and later i will read you all a story." everyone got out of their seats and went toward the back of the room where all the toys were. Angie looked at Vepar. Angie: "come on Vepar." she took his hand and walked with him to a chest full of toys. she let go of Vepar's hand and looked in the chest, Angie pulled out a rubber ball. Angie: "catch." she threw it to Vepar, he caught it and passed it back to her, she caught it. that went on for a few minutes, Vepar had fun and he felt like he had made a friend. Dina: "alright everyone clean up. it's time for a story." everyone put the toys away. Dina was sitting in a chair holding a book. the children gathered around him and sat down, Vepar and Angie were also sitting amongst the children. Dina opens the book. on 1 page was a picture and on the other page were words. Dina showed the children the picture and began to read... he read about how Joseph and Mary had to make that long journey to Bethlehem and about how they had to resort to staying in a manger and how Jesus was born... after Dina was finished reading he closed the book and put it on his desk. Dina: "you may talk amongst yourselves while i go and prepare a snack..." Dina got up from his chair and went toward a large cabinet. he opened the cabinet and got out a large box of cookies. he then got out several plates and poured out an equal amount of cookies onto each plate. he put each plate on a table. he then put the box back into the cabinet. Dina: "alright you all may go eat... but remember share the food." the children ran to the tables they sat down at the tables and began to eat the cookies. Vepar and Angie were sitting together eating from 1 plate of cookies. next chapter coming tomorrow. |
Solister Gold Sparx Gems: 2478 |
#28 Posted: 21:43:51 10/01/2010
I see Vepar has a new friend
Good chapter
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Heavy: MEDIC! Medic: NO! |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#29 Posted: 23:54:00 10/01/2010 | Topic Creator
yes... thank you.
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spyro super fan Emerald Sparx Gems: 3096 |
#30 Posted: 02:59:23 11/01/2010
its great that he is in a place that actualy dosnt judge him because he is a demon
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Kiyoteru Hiyama - "You're engulfed in a sorrowful melody, come and sleep now. Hereafter, the beginning of a tragedy must be burned into your eyes." |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#31 Posted: 21:30:23 11/01/2010 | Topic Creator
yes...
Chapter 6, it was getting to be the end of the day and children were getting ready to go home. Vepar and Angie were sitting at a table together. Angie: "tomorrow we don't have to come here so do you want meet up somewhere and we can play?" Vepar: "yes... how about we meet up in front of the Temple." Angie: "why can't we meet up at your home?" Vepar: "the Temple is my home." Angie: "really?... but the only one's who live there are the Master and the Father." Vepar: "the Master is my daddy." Angie: "really?... wow cool... so we'll meet at the Temple tomorrow?" Vepar: "yes..." Angie: "alright... well it's time to go..." everyone walks out of the room, Angie turns around. Angie: "bye Vepar. see you tomorrow..." she walks out the room. Vepar just sits there and waits. a few minutes later Jesus walks in the room. Vepar runs to him and stops in front of him. Jesus: "did you have fun?" Vepar: "yeah and i even met this angel. her name is Angie. she's really nice." Jesus: "so i see you made a little friend." Vepar: "yes and i did all sorts of fun things in here." Jesus: "tell me about it on the way home." as Vepar and Jesus walked hand in hand through the city toward the Temple, Vepar told him everything that happen that day. Jesus: "well that's wonderful. you had fun, you made a friend and you learned something about me..." Vepar: "oh and Angie and i have agreed to meet tomorrow and play. can i play with Angie tomorrow daddy?" Jesus: "of course you can..." Vepar: "thank you daddy..." they got to the Temple. in another part of the city, Angie walks inside her home, her father an angel named Angelo greets her. Angelo: "hello sweetie how was your day?" Angie: "it was great dad. i have a new friend." Angelo: "really?... who's our friend?" Angie: "his name is Vepar." Angelo: "oh is he another angel?" Angie: "no..." Angelo: "is he a human child?" Angie: "no.." Angelo: "well what is he?" Angie: "he's a demon." Angelo: "... a... a demon?" Angie: "yes..." Angelo: "... a demon?... my daughter is friends with... a demon?" Angie: "yes..." Angelo: "where did you meet him?" Angie: "at school..." Angelo: "where is he now?" Angie: "at the Temple i guess." Angelo ran out of the home, he flew above the city and toward the Temple. Vepar was in the Temple sitting on the floor. Angelo suddnely came through the Temple doors and saw Vepar. Angelo: "YOU!!" Angelo took out his sword and charged at Vepar, Angelo pinned him to the ground with 1 hand and held the tip of his sword to Vepar's neck. Angelo: "stay away from Angie you evil devil!!" Vepar was crying. Angelo: "crying won't save you, you evil creature from hell!" Angelo raised his sword and was about to stab Vepar, when all of a sudden he felt someone grab the back of his robe and stood him up. Angelo looked to see Jesus. Jesus let go of Angelo. Angelo put his sword away. Jesus: "what are you doing!?" Angelo: "Master... i was just trying to do away with this evil creature." he looked at Vepar. Vepar got up and ran behind Jesus. Jesus: "Vepar was brought here when he was just an infant and i took him in... and i'm taking care of him." Angelo: "he's an unclean creature. and he's friends with my daughter." Jesus: "he doesn't have any friends, all he has is Angie. they both like each other... let them be friends... i know you care a lot about Angie and i do too... nothing is going to happen to her if she's around Vepar." Angelo: "fine i trust your judgment Master... i will allow them to be friends..." Jesus: "good... now instead of patrolling the streets at night you'll guard the relics at night that's your job until further notice." Angelo: "yes Master." Jesus: "now... apologize to Vepar..." Angelo: "...huh?..." Jesus: "apologize to Vepar... now." Angelo looked at Vepar who was cowering behind Jesus. Angelo: "i'm sorry Vepar..." Jesus: "Vepar what do you say?" Vepar looks at Angelo fearfully. Vepar: "...i forgive you..." Angelo walks out of the Temple. Vepar gets out from behind Jesus. Jesus: "Vepar are you alright?" Vepar hugs Jesus. Vepar: "daddy he scared me..." Jesus crouches down and hugs Vepar. Jesus: "it's ok... he didn't know what he was doing... you're alright..." Vepar was trembling in fear. Jesus stands up and picks Vepar up, Jesus sits in his throne and sits Vepar down on his lap. Vepar leans on his chest for comfort. Jesus pets Vepar on the head gently. Vepar settles down and is calm within a few moments. next chapter coming tomorrow. |
Edited 2 times - Last edited at 00:35:03 13/01/2010 by torok
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Solister Gold Sparx Gems: 2478 |
#32 Posted: 22:44:27 11/01/2010
Good chapter
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Heavy: MEDIC! Medic: NO! |
MinM20 Blue Sparx Gems: 543 |
#33 Posted: 22:45:25 11/01/2010
WOW, KEWL, YICKS, NEED I GO ON?!
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I am as old as Budda, I am as young as Confusius~MniM You cannot escape from it. You chose your path, and that is the path you are destined to folow~MinM |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#34 Posted: 23:09:44 11/01/2010 | Topic Creator
thanks.
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spyro super fan Emerald Sparx Gems: 3096 |
#35 Posted: 06:11:09 12/01/2010
that chapter was exiting *kills angelo* there, thats better
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Kiyoteru Hiyama - "You're engulfed in a sorrowful melody, come and sleep now. Hereafter, the beginning of a tragedy must be burned into your eyes." |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#36 Posted: 21:06:18 12/01/2010 | Topic Creator
*brings Angelo back to life* yeah this next chapter is going to be more exiting.
Chapter 7, the next day Angie walks out of her home and walks through the city toward the Temple. Vepar is waiting outside in front of the Temple. he sees Angie coming toward him, he goes to meet her. Angie: "hi Vepar." Vepar stops in front of her. Vepar: "hi Angie. so what do you want to do?" Angie: "let's go to the playground." Vepar and Angie walk hand in hand toward the playground.when they got there there weren't many children around. there were slides, swings, see-saws and anything else that was in a playground. they played there for about an hour. they walked away from the playground enjoying the scenery of Heaven. then Vepar saw the gates of Heaven. Vepar: "Angie... do you ever wonder what's outside the gates?" Angie: "no... but my dad says that demons live there." Vepar: "do you suppose my parents are there?" Angie: "maybe..." Vepar: "my dad says that's where my parents went after they left me here... well there's only one way to know. let's go there..." Vepar went toward the gates, Angie grabbed his arm and stopped him. Angie: "wait... it might be dangerous." Vepar: "come on Angie, this may be my one chance to find out." Angie let go of Vepar. he walks outside the gates, Angie follows him. they walk into hell, the sky in hell was dark and the climate was hot. they walked deeper into hell. they saw a large building in the distance. Vepar: "do you think my parents are there?" Angie: "i guess so..." Vepar and Angie walk in front of this large building. it was made out of rock and it was tall. the doors were made out of rock and metal and there were some windows with no glass. Vepar: "come on let's go check it out." Vepar walked toward the doors when he saw a flash of light in front of him, he stepped back quickly and saw Dina standing in front of him. Dina: "the only checking out you 2 will do will be the checking out of here... we're not supposed to be down here." Vepar: "why are you scared?" Dina: "me scared no... i'm petrified. and right now we are all in danger." the doors to the building opened and 3 demons came out. Vepar and Angie hid behind Dina. one demon was a female and the other 2 were male. the female's name was Deumos and the male's names were Asmoday and Bael. the 3 demons came closer to them. Dina, Angie and Vepar stepped back. Deumos: "well what do we have here Asmoday?" Asmoday: "i don't know Deumos... what do you think Bael?" Bael: "i'm thinking we got trespassers." the demons circled them. Deumos: "oh and if it isn't our brother Dina..." Asmoday: "oh and look at this... it's a little demon..." the 3 demons looked at Vepar. Bael: "i've never seen him around here before..." Dina tried to leave with the children. the 3 demons stepped in front of him. Deumos: "what's the hurry? we'd love for you to stick around and meet our master." Dina: "uh no thanks... we just took a wrong turn and we'll be going..." Dina pushed the 3 demons out of the way. Vepar and Angie started to run toward Heaven. Deumos: "get them!" Dina and the children ran toward Heaven. the demons ran after them. next chapter coming tomorrow. |
Solister Gold Sparx Gems: 2478 |
#37 Posted: 21:18:58 12/01/2010
Sounds like The Lion King to me, but good chapter as always
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Heavy: MEDIC! Medic: NO! |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#38 Posted: 20:56:29 13/01/2010 | Topic Creator
yeah that's where i got the inspiration for some of the dialog. thanks.
Chapter 8, the 3 demons chased after them, Dina flew to Heaven and left the children behind, since Vepar and Angie didn't know how to fly they were running as fast as they could. Deumos pinned Angie to the ground, Angie: "Vepar help!!" Vepar ran toward Deumos and clawed her across the face, she let go of Angie. Vepar and Angie continued running. Deumos: "GET THEM!!" Asmoday and Bael ran past Deumos and chased after the children, Deumos joined the chase too. In Heaven, Dina flew toward the Temple, he ran through the doors, he stopped in front of Jesus. Dina breathed heavily exhausted. Jesus: "Dina what is it?" Dina: "Vepar and Angie... in hell... demons chasing after them..." Jesus got up from his throne. Jesus: "you just left them there!?" Dina: "... i didn't have any weapons to fight off the demons with..." Jesus disappears... In hell, Vepar and Angie ran to the gates but the gates were closed, Vepar and Angie turned around to see the 3 demons closing in they were growling. and coming closer. Angie cowered behind Vepar, Vepar growled at the demons threateningly, the demons stopped. Deumos laughed "oh look he's trying to be threatening..." all 3 demons laughed and then growled and came closer with teeth bared. Vepar cowered as well. then a big light appears in between the children and the 3 demons, Jesus appears in the light, the 3 demons fall onto their backs and tremble in fear. Deumos: "please don't hurt us." Asmoday: "please have mercy." Jesus: "silence!" the demons trembled in fear... Jesus stands over them. Jesus: "never come near my children again." Deumos: "those were your children? i didn't know that." Asmoday: "none of us knew who they were..." Bael: "i knew who they were." the light around Jesus grew brighter and the demons fled. the light faded away, Vepar and Angie came up to Jesus, Jesus looks at Vepar. Jesus: "you knew never to come down here." Vepar: "i... i'm sorry..." Jesus: "let's go home." they walked back to Heaven and into the Temple. Jesus sat in his thone. Dina, Vepar and Angie were standing in front of him. Jesus: "Dina..." Dina stepped forward. Dina: "yes Master?..." Jesus: "take Angie home and tell her parents what happen... i've got to talk to Vepar alone." Dina: "yes Master." Jesus: "oh and you'll also patrol the streets of Heaven as a night guard." Dina: "yes Master." Dina turns toward Angie. Dina: "come Angie..." Dina looks at Vepar. Dina: "good luck..." Dina and Angie walk out of the Temple. Vepar: "i'm sorry dad... i'm really really sorry..." Jesus: "i told you not to go beyond the gates of Heaven... you not only disobeyed me but you put Angie in danger." Vepar: "i... i was just trying to find out where my parents were... you said they lived beyond the gates..." Jesus: "Vepar come here..." Vepar slowly walks over to Jesus, he picks Vepar up and sits him on his lap. Jesus: "look there's a bit of truth i held back from you about your parents..." Vepar: "you lied to me?" Jesus: "no i didn't. and don't accuse me sinning... i only held the truth from you to protect you..." Vepar: "what is the truth?" Jesus: "your patents died a long time ago..." Vepar: "they died?..." Jesus: "yes... after they sent you away down the river of life they went back to hell and were killed." Vepar started to cry, he hugged Jesus and wept, Jesus put his arms around him. Jesus: "shhh it's alright... 1 day i'll bring you parents back to life..." Vepar looked up at him with tear stained eyes. Vepar: "when?" Jesus: "soon... very soon... i can't tell you the exact moment... but it'll be soon." Vepar stopped crying and wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his robe... he managed to smile a little. next chapter coming tomorrow. |
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 22:11:14 13/01/2010 by torok
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Solister Gold Sparx Gems: 2478 |
#39 Posted: 22:05:48 13/01/2010
Aww, good chapter
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Heavy: MEDIC! Medic: NO! |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#40 Posted: 23:04:04 14/01/2010 | Topic Creator
thanks,
Chapter 9, a few minutes later Angelo came into the Temple with a sword in his hand, he saw Vepar sitting near Jesus' throne, Jesus wasn't there.. Angelo ran at Vepar and gripped him by the neck. Angelo: "you put my daughter in danger! i should have done this a long time ago!" Angelo held the tip of his sword toward Vepar. suddenly Angie came through the doors of the Temple and saw what was happening. Angie: "dad NO!!" Angelo lowers his sword and turns his head to looks at Angie. Angelo: "honey this demon could have killed you... i'm only trying to protect you." Angie: "he didn't mean to hurt me... please don't kill him!!" Vepar bit Angelo's hand, Angelo let him go. Vepar ran and hid behind Angie, Angelo ran up to Angie. Angelo: "Angie get out of the way." Angie: "no... if you want to kill Vepar you're going to have to kill me too..." Angelo stood there for a moment, he then put his sword away and walked out of the Temple. Angie looks at Vepar. Angie: "are you alright?" Vepar: "i think so..." Angie: "don't worry i wont let my dad hurt you." Vepar: "thank you." Angie: "you're welcome." she hugs him, he hugs her back. they let go. Angie: "i'll see you tomorrow..." Vepar: "ok..." Angie: "good night..." Angie leaves the Temple. Vepar goes and sits by Jesus' throne. next chapter coming tomorrow. |
Solister Gold Sparx Gems: 2478 |
#41 Posted: 07:03:25 15/01/2010
Oh dear, looks like the envy between the father and the demon isn't over
Good chapter
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Heavy: MEDIC! Medic: NO! |
spyro super fan Emerald Sparx Gems: 3096 |
#42 Posted: 07:28:46 15/01/2010
Quote: Solister
*shoots angelo* well now it is
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Kiyoteru Hiyama - "You're engulfed in a sorrowful melody, come and sleep now. Hereafter, the beginning of a tragedy must be burned into your eyes." |
MinM20 Blue Sparx Gems: 543 |
#43 Posted: 15:14:28 15/01/2010
*slaps spyro super fan upside the head* be nice, will ya
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I am as old as Budda, I am as young as Confusius~MniM You cannot escape from it. You chose your path, and that is the path you are destined to folow~MinM |
spyro super fan Emerald Sparx Gems: 3096 |
#44 Posted: 15:27:06 15/01/2010
*doges the slap*ok ok
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Kiyoteru Hiyama - "You're engulfed in a sorrowful melody, come and sleep now. Hereafter, the beginning of a tragedy must be burned into your eyes." |
Solister Gold Sparx Gems: 2478 |
#45 Posted: 16:07:58 15/01/2010
lol at that
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Heavy: MEDIC! Medic: NO! |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#46 Posted: 22:10:52 15/01/2010 | Topic Creator
LOL is right...
Chapter 10, the next day Vepar was waiting in front of the Temple, he saw Angie coming towards the Temple, Vepar walked up to her. Vepar: "hi Angie." Angie: "hi Vepar..." Vepar: "what do you want to do today?" Angie: "today Gabriel is teaching angels how to fly and i just wanted to see if you want to come along." Vepar: "ok... but i've never flown before." Angie: "me neither so don't worry you're not alone... come on let's go..." they walked out of the city towards a big hill. Gabriel was standing on the top of the hill with young angels standing in front of him there were some older angels there as well. Angie and Vepar got to the top of the hill and stood with the others angels. Gabriel saw Vepar. Gabriel: "hmm a demon... i'm gonna be teaching a demon how to fly... well there's a first time for everything." Gabriel adressed everyone. Gabriel: "every young angel will partner up with an older more experienced angel. the older angel will help the younger ones fly." every young angel paired up with an older one. and the older ones were instructing the younger ones. Angie was with an older angel, Angie looked at Vepar who was just standing there with no one. Angie looked at the older angel. Angie: "could we take Vepar along too?" Angie points at Vepar. older angel: "him?... oh no only one at a time... i can't take 2 at once...now pay attention-..." the angel kept instructing Angie. Vepar looked around for someone to partner up with. Vepar sees that no one is going to come to him, he walks up to Gabriel. Gabriel: "why aren't you with someone?" Vepar: "well no one wants to be with me sir..." Gabriel: "i guess i'll have to be your partner... ok now pay attention... flap those wings of yours until you get some strength in them... take hold of my hand." Vepar takes hold of his hand, Gabriel: "now keep up with me and flap your wings..." Gabriel started to run while holding Vepar's hand, Vepar was running alongside him while flapping his wings. Gabriel takes flight while holding onto Vepar, Vepar was below him flapping his wings. Vepar slowly rose into the air and he was flying alongside Gabriel. Vepar: "i'm flying..." Gabriel: "that's right... keep going..." Vepar flapped his wings faster and looked down, he saw they were flying over the golden city. next chapter coming tomorrow. |
Solister Gold Sparx Gems: 2478 |
#47 Posted: 23:24:38 15/01/2010
Good chapter
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Heavy: MEDIC! Medic: NO! |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#48 Posted: 03:02:51 16/01/2010 | Topic Creator
thanks.
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BEST FAN EVER Gold Sparx Gems: 2194 |
#49 Posted: 04:42:55 16/01/2010
Interesting...
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I believe in Jesus Christ my Savior. If you do too and aren't scared to admit it then copy and paste this in your signature. |
torok Platinum Sparx Gems: 6123 |
#50 Posted: 13:35:19 16/01/2010 | Topic Creator
thanks. i didn't know you read my stories.
Chapter 11, Vepar looked straight ahead now, flying was amazing, he felt so free. Gabriel: "i'm going to let go now... don't stop flapping your wings now." Gabriel lets go of Vepar's hand, Vepar is a bit shaky at first but then he flew normally, he looked around at all the clouds around him, he flew through some of them enjoying himself. he felt a tap on his shoulder, he looked beside him and Angie was flying by herself, she was smiling. Vepar smiled too. Angie: "are you having fun?" Vepar: "yes. i feel so alive." Angie extended her hand toward Vepar, he took it in his hand. they flew faster, they flew through the clouds and laughed really enjoying themselves. Vepar looked on his other side and saw Angelo flying in the distance, he glares at Vepar and disappears behind a bunch of clouds. Vepar looked ahead nervously. he looks at Angie. Angie: "let's fly above the flower fields." they dove downward and flew directly above a big field of flowers, Angie looked at all the flowers happily. she reached down with her other hand attempting to pick one but they were flying too fast. Vepar reached down and picked a big flower, he gave it to Angie, she took it in her other hand and smelled it. she looked at Vepar happily. Angie: "thank you." Vepar: "you're welcome." they both smiled at each other, Angie looks ahead and Vepar gazes upward for a moment, high near the clouds he saw Angelo flying near the clouds looking directly at Vepar, Angelo disappeared above the clouds. Vepar looked ahead nervous again. Angie: "let's go to the Temple." Vepar: "why?" Angie: "my parents said they'd meet me there so we can worship." Vepar: "alright. let's go..." they flew upwards back around the clouds again. they flew toward the golden city. next chapter coming today. |
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