darkSpyro

this is a story of how Malefor fell and became exilled this is just a made up story it dosent realate to Spyro but it dose relate to Malefor

please read

cool,sounds interestin.

and where is the storey?

here's chapter 1 "in the beginning"
The Creator created everything from the earth to the heavens. in the earth he made animals and dragons and forests and desserts but in the heavens he made a big forest and he made angles some angles were special in small ways and in some big ways The Creater made a very great angle he was wearing a purple robe and his name was Malefor. Malefor was the leader of the angles. one day The Creator showed them an image of two humans (Jesus and The Virgin Mary) he told the angles "these two humans will be you king and queen you will bow to them." all the angles bowed before the image exept for Malefor. Malefor siad in an angery voice "I shall not bow down to infearer creaturs i'm the greatest angle i should be worshiped all who want to be slaves to the crator stay with him but those who want to be thier own boss come and follow me..." Just them Malefor was transformed into a dragon a purple dragon half of the angles came to Malefor and were transformed into apes The Creator then siad "I give all of you one chance either follow me or the purple dragon." most of the angles went to Malefor some of them stayed with The Creator. Malefor then said "see they know who the right one is." one arckangle then said "I SHALL SERVE The Creator!"

to be continued...

some christianity! i like it

I LOVE A STORIE WITH JESUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You’ve been reading Milton`s "Paradise Lost ", haven’t you?

Sounds good.

cool!!!!its got christianity in it!!!!!!i like that!!!!and the storys really good!!!!

Quote: Observer

You’ve been reading Milton`s "Paradise Lost ", haven’t you?

umm no???

The story seems pretty similar to me.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paradise_lost

yeah it's sort of like that.

chapter 2 "the war."

the arcangle was Michal Malefor's brother. both sides starred at eachother the ape army charged at the angles. the angle army and the ape army met. the angles were stronger than the apes. all the apes were thrown out of Heaven and into Heck it all came down to Malefor the dragon and Michal the angle. they both flew striat up in the air and Malefor said "you cant defeat me Michal I AM ETERNAL..." Malefor shot a fireball at Michal but missed Michal drew out his sword and him and Malefor circled eachother Malefor growled at Michal. then 8 other angles with swords came into the air they made a circle around Malefor. Malefor growld and said "What is this!?!" the angles alonge with Michal charged at Malefor and broght him down he was falling into the pit of Heck and as he was falling he yelled "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!"

to be continued...

Quote: torok

yeah it's sort of like that.

More like exactly...

chapter 3 "the fall of man"

Malefor was laying at the bottom of Heck saying in pain "There is so much pain here the agony i must BE FREEEE..." Malefor flew up and found a way out of Heck throu a mountian (The Mountain of Malefor) he flew a short distence and landed into a large apple tree (the tree of knowleage) he stood on a branch overlooking a garden. a human female was walking by. Nalefor said "the creator fancies this human if i'm going down i'm taking the ones he loves with me." Malefor jumped out of the tree to meet the human he then talked to her in a calm voice "Eve... Eve..." Eve then turned to gaze up at the dragon saying "you are a dragon." Malefor then siad "and you are the most lovly creature in a perfect garden. if only you knew it." Eve then said "well i do know it now you have told mee." Malefor put his tail around Eve and said "will you pick fruit for us" Eve held up a peach to Malefor and said "here" Malefor then said looking at the tree of knowleage "not peaches today something rare like that tree in the middle." Eve then said "no we cant eat that The Creator has fobiden it." Malefor looked at her and said "if The Creator forbids stuff then this garden is no more than a prison The Creator said you are free then be free pick and eat" Eve said "if we eat the apple we will die." Malefor then said "you wont die death is a big word you dont understand but if you eat the apple you could be like The Creator pick and eat." Eve walked over to the tree took an apple from it and eat Malefor just smiled and said "perfection." Eve gave the apple to her husband Adam he ate as well. Adam and Eve were ashamed and covered themselves with leaves. then they herd The Creator saying"Adam Eve why are you hiding and why are you ashamed... YOU ATE FROM THE TREE you have broken my single command." Eve then said " the purple dragon resond with me he made me listen." Malefor ran and hid behind the tree The Creator said to Malefor "possesor i know you be trapped within the mountian from whence you came breaker of brightness." Malefor was sucked into the mountain The Creator turned his attention to Adam and Eve and said "Theire shall be a way back to this paridise but for now you shall struggle to survive but there will be a way back and mankind will be helped by a dragon.(he's talking about Spyro.) and another savior shall be my son (Jesus)"

A bit predictable, perhaps you should add a twist or two...

chapter 4 "The second Purple Dragon."

1300 years later...
there were 4 dragon gardians Ignitus Cyril Volteer and Terrador. The Creator gave them a very special egg to take care of it came out of a beam of light from the sky it was a purple egg it descended itno Ignitus' paw. The Creator spoke "Dragon gardians i give you this purple egg you must protect it with your lives i shall see to it that it hatches safly it shall help save the world. there will be difficalties but i will protect you and the egg be carefull the enemy Malefor shall be planning to destroy the egg."
and you guys know the rest of the story Spyro is born and 15 years later saves the world and kills of Malefor right?
well thats not the end of the story
4600 years later...
stay tuned please to find out what happens.

chapter 5 "Spyro meets Michial."

Spyro was asleep at the temple when a bright light came down apon him and he awoke to find an angle standing in front of him. Spyro got up and the angle said "Do not be afraid i have come here to tell you that you did not kill Malefor he's alive and he's planing revenge on the world. The prince of peace wants to meet you so that you may help in this war. Spyro said "what Malefor is'nt dead but... but thats impossible." the angle reasponded "i'm sure this news comes as a shock to you forgive me for my explanation but this is not the place to acount for missing time come with me Spyro." the angle took Spyro into the clouds were they stopped at this golden gate. the gates flung open to reavel a forest and a river and a golden temple the angle then said "We'll fallow the river it will lead us to the Golden Temple were The Nazerean shall be expecting you." they continued onward to The Golden Temple. when they got there a crowd of angles humans and alot of animals and dragons were waiting outside the enterance to the Temple.Spyro and the angle made thier way to the very front of the crowd...

stay tuned for chaptr 6

chapter 6 "Spyro meets The King Of Kings."

another angle said "Ah Michial i see you've brought The Purple Dragon. go into the Golden Temple our Master requests the dragon's presents." Michial and Spyro walked into the temple. the inside of it was golden it was a lone hallway with doors on the walls they came to the back of the temple were they saw two golden thrones the one to the right was empty and in the one to the left sat a man with a shinning white robe. Michial kneeled to the man and motioned for Spyro to do the same. Spyro lowered his wings and body in a crouching possition with his snout touching the floor. Michial got up and said "Your Majesty here is Spyro the dragon which you have requested..." Michial bowed his head and left. Spyro sat down on the floor looking at the man with respect. the man got up from his throne and went over to Spyro and said "I am Jesus..."

to be continued...

Next they're going to go to war with Luci... ,I mean Malefor and win.
It's not that fun when you know the ending.

hu yes they are going to war with luci... i ment Malefor and win i know it's predicable but it's all i have to write about.

chapter 7 "the conversation"

Spyro looked at him for a moment and said "The angle told me that The Dark Master returned is it true?" Jesus replied "i'm afraid so Malefor wants to reclaim my throne as well as yours." Spyro said "Malefor is treatening to take your throne yet you seem so calm." Jesus replied "i dont imagine he wouud expend all that effort if he didnt feel thretend by us." Spyro asked "why should he?" Jesus answerd "throughout history i have been the savior of the world and like me your power gose far beyond what you could imagine. Malefor knows this he could have accomplished anything but insetd chose evil the world has been spiroling in chaos ever scince. Our existins is God's way of balencing the world. Malefor gets his power from destruction it is the only way he knows Spyro." Spyro resonded by asking "why should i be any different?" Jesus replied "Because God knows that your heart wouldnt allow it he beleives we are destend to bring about a new age of everlasting peace. and desruction will not have a role in that age."

to be continued...

Interesting remake...
(By the way, it's angel.)

You can always change the ending...

thanks i dont know how to spell

chapter 8 "The war"

Michial ran into the Golden Temple and said "Your Highness the enemy has been spotted they are heading this way IT'S WAR!" they all made thier way to the enterence of the Golden Temple Jesus annouced to the crowd before him "not much time is left you must prevent the enemy from getting through the gates every moment couts!" the crowd headed off toward the gates. Michial replies "i know your on to something sire i've known you for too long." Jesus replied " go to the others Michial a strong leader will be needed. Spyro you go too." Michial and Spyro flew into the air and headed for the gates themselfs. when they got there the good guys were runing away and shouting things like "run for your lives WE,RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!" the gates were open and an ominus figure was standing alone in front of the gates darkness surrounding him. Michial gasped when he saw who it was he said "Malefor" Michial flew up in the air toward Malefor. Malefor just growled as he said "MICHIAL!!!" Malefor lunged in the air and flew at Michial. Michial just turned the other way and flew away with Malefor behind him.Spyro launched himself up in the air flew at Malefor and tried to bring him out of the sky. the two dragons were twirling in the air spiraling downwards Spyro let go of Malefor when they were close to the ground. Michial flew in next to Spyro. Malefor then growled "YOU CAN NOT DEFEAT ME I AM ETERNAL!!!" Malefor let out a beam of fury breath at Michial. Spyro flew in front of Michial and shot out a purple fury breath. the 2 beams colided with eachouther makeing a white light in the middle. Michial saw an oppertunity and hit Malefor with his sword which only knocked Malefor onto his back. Malefor got up and went toward them but he looked behind him and there dressed in blue and white levetating it the air above Malefor was the Queen of Heaven herself. Malefor looked at her with anger and confusion and said "WHAT Mary WHAT IS THIS?" she came near him and he said "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" then she dove on him and crushed his haed and he disappeared. Michial said " thank you Spyro you saved my life" and then everyone heard the voice of the Creator say "Rejoyce my chilren a new age has begun a new world is forming and the reality of my perfect world has come to pass.Rejoyce therefor." just then coming through the gates was Cynder. she saw Spyro and he saw her they ran toward eachother nuzzeling eachother and being in perfect joy and happieness forever more

the end

The climax happens a bit too soon...
Also, I don't think you portrayed Malefor as evil as you should, instead of being happy I felt a bit sorry...

This is a good story. Even though a LOT of lines have been stolen from DOTD.

The first chapter is Christian because Malefor represents Lucifer.

well yaeh

Quote: Observer

The climax happens a bit too soon...
Also, I don't think you portrayed Malefor as evil as you should, instead of being happy I felt a bit sorry...

well of course i portrayed Malefor that evil as i did he tryed to kill us in DOTD then he tryed to destroy the world by blowing it up. you didnt think that lucifer was just a rebel do you HE'S PURE EVIL and he WANTS TO KILL US ALL!!! and why would you fell sorry for that BEAST anyways

Quote: torok

you didnt think that lucifer was just a rebel do you HE'S PURE EVIL and he WANTS TO KILL US ALL!!!

How do you know that?
Besides, Lucifer doesn't exist...

how about malefor tack over the world this is what I draw on paint today http://s710.photobucket.com/al...ent=malefor.jpg

Quote: Observer

Quote: torok

you didnt think that lucifer was just a rebel do you HE'S PURE EVIL and he WANTS TO KILL US ALL!!!

How do you know that?
Besides, Lucifer doesn't exist...

thats what HE wants you to think. to think that he dosent exist so that HE can mess up your life and take your soul and keep you away from God. dont you see your playing right into his hands. i'm trying to help you befor it's too late.hu, but if you dont want to help yourself by fighting agianst lucifer so be it you've made your choice so you shall suffer the same fate as all the nonbelievers ETERNAL SUFFERING!!!!

Quote: torok

Quote: Observer

Quote: torok

you didnt think that lucifer was just a rebel do you HE'S PURE EVIL and he WANTS TO KILL US ALL!!!

How do you know that?
Besides, Lucifer doesn't exist...

thats what HE wants you to think. to think that he dosent exist so that HE can mess up your life and take your soul and keep you away from God. dont you see your playing right into his hands. i'm trying to help you befor it's too late.hu, but if you dont want to help yourself by fighting agianst lucifer so be it you've made your choice so you shall suffer the same fate as all the nonbelievers ETERNAL SUFFERING!!!!

How do you know what Lucifer wants?
You Christians really get off on this eternal damnation...

beacause the Bible says so.

Quote: torok

beacause the Bible says so.

Why do you think it's true?

UMMMM.. beacause i just do.

Quote: torok

UMMMM.. beacause i just do.

Come on, you must have some reason...

there is proof in the world. people kill for money (greed) they lie they steal and a million other things there must be some evil source behind this right

Quote: torok

there is proof in the world. people kill for money (greed) they lie they steal and a million other things there must be some evil source behind this right

Uhm, no.

People have instinctive, evolutionary tendencies to satisfy their basic urges and desires (food, water, sleep, pleasure).
When those urges become too powerful, they can lose their temper and do something that hurts someone else and, for a short period of time at least, satisfies their urge.
Some people can control their urges better than others, depending on how they were raised.

That's simply how people (and all other animals) are. Can you prove this "source of all evil"?

well yes kind of many people have worshiped these demons and they sacrafised children to them they are the aztecs (nice buildings but bad religons.) i cant tell you anything more just look up a documeneryt on youtube about the devil. it was recently on the history chanal. you will find that many religons have some souces of evil.

Belief in good and evil as personalized beings is characteristic for primitive cultures. Primitive humans projected their fears and unhapiness in horrible, ugly, evil beings and their desires in friendly, beautiful and protective beings.

Just because a bunch of people believe same or similar things doesn't prove that those things are true.

i like it but the fact you put christianty in was good but well i mean not all religons belive in christanity

Yeah your right DARK CINDER

These tendencies were characteristic for all primitive humans. That's why they appear in most of world's religions.

I will rephrase: Just because a bunch of religions believe same or similar things doesn't prove that those things are true.

your right but i do beleive most of the things about the christian religon.

YO, DUDE!!! MARY'S NOT THE QUEEN OF HEAVEN! THERE IS ONLY JESUS CHRIST, KING OF KINGS!!!!

oh alright i'm sorry... i know that Jesus is the king of kings... and i do honor him in that way...

but i aslo respect his mother.

MORE!

uh there is no more... sorry.