darkSpyro

I hate to disappoint you, but I didn't disappoint myself.

Why am I so awkward... *rolls away and dies*

Well something's bad happened, and I don't know what. Knowing you though, I shouldn't be surprised.
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I think I talk weird in real life. I've always thought my voice doesn't match my face, I look older than I am.
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I think there's a difference between stating something that's wrong, and complaining. Either way, I complain a lot lol.
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I'll need to make up an excuse. I should be used to this, I've dealt with a lot of annoying people.

People keep putting this idea in my head, and it's making me doubt everything..

Do I force myself through this program and graduate on time with the possibility of getting of a job doing something I think I want to do?
Or do I switch to a different program and probably stay in school an extra year and possibly get a job doing something I'm sure I want to do?

I'm so ****ing lost and confused. I'm just done with everything. I'm so tired of this.

I think I may have made up my mind. I'm just afraid of disappointing everyone...

wow I'm kind of lost for words. You are literally the one person I should always be able to rely on for support and help and who should believe in me and make me feel good about myself and instead you straight up tell me I'm deluded, you don't want to help me, I'll fail and that I've got no chance? Well obviously not if you don't help me at all. You should be the person supporting me when others put me down, but instead it's the other way around. And don't you dare tell me you didn't know. It's all I've wanted for 3 years and admittedly I could have made more of an effort back then but there's only so much I can do on my own. You say to me I need to make up my mind about what I want to do, I need to develop talents, I need to stop 'wasting time', and as soon as I decide to do all that you have a go at me! I'm aware of the likelihood of success. I'm aware how some have turned out. But you're not giving me a chance, you have no faith in me. And don't worry, I'm not discouraged. In fact I want it even more just so I can prove I'm actually worth something. And only wanting me to live with you so you don't lose child benefit? What kind of ******* selfish outlook is that? All you ever tell me is negative things about me and it's got to the point where I'm happier at school than at home and it shouldn't be like that. I struggle enough with self esteem without you constantly telling me I'm useless and will never amount to anything. You shouldn't be the one bringing me to tears on a regular basis, yet here you are. I really don't know how much longer I can cope.

I hate this.

Yeah.. I like how this is just being totally ignored like it's not important or anything. Yeah. Thanks.

Dad, you're a grown man. You aren't a little five year old. You're *****ing and complaining because I stood up to you about something you KNOW hurts the whole family. And you don't care, either. Now you wanna act like a little kid and ignore me and be all pissy after I answer a question you asked me five damn times already? And you know that I have to be at school early tomorrow, and you decided to not bother to pull that stick out of your ass, and make mom wake up and take me, just to say you'll do it 10 minutes later, for the sole purpose of pissing us off? Wow. Maybe you're the one that has to grow up, not me. Let's just hope you get off of this period thing soon, because I ain't dealing with you if you're gonna get all pissy when things don't go your way.

Man the Book of Mormon changed my life style. A bit.

Oh yeah.
I'm smarter than everyone. Glad that's settled.

so I've been milling about with character designs that i just can't seem to get right and i was complaining about style changes again and my sister looked at them and was like "i don't think so! i think they look like they'd all be in the same anime if they were in one - and if they were in one, those three look like they'd be typical best friends!"

I'm so ****ing confused, I don't know what feels right..!

YOU GOTTA BE ****ING KIDDING ME! I'M SUPPOSED TO BE FRONT RUNNING BUT THEN TWO SCHMUCKS CALL OUT AND I HAVE CASHIER?!?! OH MY GOD! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT OH MY GOD OH MY GOD MY MY GOOOOOOOD! WHY WHY WHY? NONE OF YOU SEEM TO UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH I HAAAAAAAATE CASHIERING! I. AM. MISERABLE!!

**** YOU ********. ALL OF YOU. I THOUGHT THIS WAS ****ING OVER YEARS AGO. GOOD TO SEE YOU IDIOTS ARE STILL AS IMMATURE AS ALWAYS. NOW GET THE **** OUT OF MY LIFE.

Really, you tell a person who has been suicidal for years to kill themselves. What kind of ass and idiot are you?

I wonder how Crayola ****ed this up. I mean one of the pencils that I have from this box is actually curved and it's really pissing me off. Was this the reason why I barely touched this box? But god, how does a factory make a slightly curved pencil?!

Ugh...

Good to see you're off your period Dad.

So, you want me to ask a question you need an answer to, but when I just shout it up the stairs, that's not good enough? I have to run all the way upstairs to ask the question you want an answer to?

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And now you won't let me go and buy something with my own money? **** you. It's my money, and I can buy what I want with it. Why should I not get to buy anything, just for not asking a question you wanted an answer to, and you were to lazy to get of your ****ing ***, and now you won't drive me?

Things I created on my own with no help from any mortal. I linger in the darkness. A monster is calling my name. I wish to stay with you, alone, softly with only you. Tell me a story of your hive... of your safety and nearly to zero threats.... Watch over me with proper eyes and a true heart of a parent. The rampaging chaos on the surface is what I wish to evoid and never witness again. I will build my house in your world to escape. I will lay with you for hours and watch you for hours.

In my world of chaos, I lay inside of it and watch the monster itself...
That is my destiny....

I can see you...

....


But are you real...?

Go away bad thoughts...