darkSpyro

Do you think they hold the same value as normal relationships?

No, but I wouldn't discourage people from partaking in them.

Not even close. They pretty much never work out either.

Yes, considering I'm currently in one.

I've been in one for almost 2 years now. I'm as happy as can be. <3

Quote: ThroneOfMalefor

Not even close. They pretty much never work out either.

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Most definitely. The almost 6 months I've been in one have been the best of my life and I don't see why it any way has less value than a 'normal' one. If anything I think that you have to have a greater amount of trust in each other and you also appreciate each other more when you're with them. Just my opinion though.

I think they can work out if both partners are willing to work hard to be together. However I'm someone who seeks and longs physical affection, like cuddling and kisses. So for me, I don't think it would work if the partner is really far. Say if Sess and I were to be in a relationship, we can actually see each other since we live hours away and thus it can work out to some degree. But if me and ThroneOfMalefor were to be in a relationship, it would be really hard since we live on opposite ends of the coast.

But for those who are more on on the "recluse" side, and don't really care for the cuddling aspect, I think it can work. It's just for me, as someone who wants to cuddle, it won't work because then I would feel lonley even more than when I was single.

Ehh, I dont find them that great. It's something that I'm not interested in I'm like TFS. I want physical affection and I wouldn't get that in a long distance one, obviously. If you want one, or are in one, congrats! It's just not something for me.

I was in one and it went well but because we lived in different countries and had different goals we decided to just be friends, which sucks but I think friendship is more important because if youre in a relationship I feel theyre your friend over your bf/gf if that makes any sense

They never work out, you'll just end up in a heartbreak, unless your a lucky person. Like, 2% of people still keep their relationship online. Unless of course it's someone you know In Real Life, then I think you'd be fine.

As for your question; Maybe.

My ex boyfriend moved to Vegas (I'm on the East Coast) shortly after we got together. We maintained an incredible relationship for over a year.
If you have never been in a ld relationship, you don't get to say that they don't have the same value as "normal" relationships. That's pretty ignorant.

Look at how many people saying yes in this topic. They're the people who have been in ld relationships. Look at the people saying no, have they?
I've been in plenty of "normal" relationships, both good and bad. My ldr was no different.

^I have been, whether you have been or not shouldn't matter anyways since this is an opinionated discussion.
They are most certainly of less value because of the lack of tactile affection, an undoubtedly huge part of it.
Not a single person out there seeking a serious relationship would disagree that seeing each other in person every day is infinitely better than otherwise, there's only so much you could convey through text/video. Sorry, but from experience it's so lackluster. You can make as much out of it as you want but count me out, and good luck on your excursions.

Now, if this whole thing started online and then you plan to meet up, you could have something going there. I find on a whole they work less often when you meet first in person and you never really see each other after that, it is a step back in the relationship and even somewhat discouraging.

It can work

@ThroneofMalefor How can you have an opinion on something if you haven't been involved with it, was my point.
To say that they have less of a value in general is ridiculous. If your personal experience was bad that's a specific scenario, but to say that in general they're less than typical relationships? That just doesn't make any sense.

Obviously you miss out on a lot. The physical connection is very important in a relationship and you can't keep a long distance relationship going forever. They aren't my ideal choice, but if I met someone I really cared for I wouldn't let something as simple as distance keep me from being with that person. If you're looking for a serious relationship you should be able to overcome obstacles such as that.

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Quote: Bumblebunnii

@ThroneofMalefor How can you have an opinion on something if you haven't been involved with it, was my point.
To say that they have less of a value in general is ridiculous. If your personal experience was bad that's a specific scenario, but to say that in general they're less than typical relationships? That just doesn't make any sense.

Obviously you miss out on a lot. The physical connection is very important in a relationship and you can't keep a long distance relationship going forever. They aren't my ideal choice, but if I met someone I really cared for I wouldn't let something as simple as distance keep me from being with that person. If you're looking for a serious relationship you should be able to overcome obstacles such as that.

I think you're looking at dating the wrong way with this. If you know that the relationship won't last since the beginning, then that means something is wrong. Dating is basically supposed to be finding the person whom you'll be with for the rest of you're life, it's like a best friendship except kissing and sexy times are involved.

Now I've never been in an LDR before (heck or a relationship for that matter), but the people I've had crushes on (including currently) have to require it. So I agree that with you that if you really want it, then you have to work for it. And it CAN work. But for me, I need affection. Even with the promise that we can meet up sometime in the future, it just won't work for me. I'm a hopeless romantic and I need affection. I'm not clingy but I get very touchy, if that makes sense.

Quote: TheFlyingSeal

Quote: Bumblebunnii

@ThroneofMalefor How can you have an opinion on something if you haven't been involved with it, was my point.
To say that they have less of a value in general is ridiculous. If your personal experience was bad that's a specific scenario, but to say that in general they're less than typical relationships? That just doesn't make any sense.

Obviously you miss out on a lot. The physical connection is very important in a relationship and you can't keep a long distance relationship going forever. They aren't my ideal choice, but if I met someone I really cared for I wouldn't let something as simple as distance keep me from being with that person. If you're looking for a serious relationship you should be able to overcome obstacles such as that.

I think you're looking at dating the wrong way with this. If you know that the relationship won't last since the beginning, then that means something is wrong. Dating is basically supposed to be finding the person whom you'll be with for the rest of you're life, it's like a best friendship except kissing and sexy times are involved.

Now I've never been in an LDR before (heck or a relationship for that matter), but the people I've had crushes on (including currently) have to require it. So I agree that with you that if you really want it, then you have to work for it. And it CAN work. But for me, I need affection. Even with the promise that we can meet up sometime in the future, it just won't work for me. I'm a hopeless romantic and I need affection. I'm not clingy but I get very touchy, if that makes sense.

She means that it can't last forever if you never meet, or live together in the end, you couldn't go twenty years in a ld, you need to know the future will be possible in that you'll eventually mean together. That's what she means.

Quote: Bumblebunnii

My ex boyfriend moved to Vegas (I'm on the East Coast) shortly after we got together. We maintained an incredible relationship for over a year.
If you have never been in a ld relationship, you don't get to say that they don't have the same value as "normal" relationships. That's pretty ignorant.

Look at how many people saying yes in this topic. They're the people who have been in ld relationships. Look at the people saying no, have they?
I've been in plenty of "normal" relationships, both good and bad. My ldr was no different.

2/3 of my relationships were long distance. They both ended fairly quickly and thinking about them still hurts. I don't see how long distance can actually feel the same as an irl one. My irl one felt much more rewarding (although that also ended in hurt but w/e). I'm not trashing people who are in long distance relationships by the way, I'm just saying I never got as much out of them as my other, non long distance relationship.

Quote: Bumblebunnii

@ThroneofMalefor How can you have an opinion on something if you haven't been involved with it, was my point.
To say that they have less of a value in general is ridiculous. If your personal experience was bad that's a specific scenario, but to say that in general they're less than typical relationships? That just doesn't make any sense.

Obviously you miss out on a lot. The physical connection is very important in a relationship and you can't keep a long distance relationship going forever. They aren't my ideal choice, but if I met someone I really cared for I wouldn't let something as simple as distance keep me from being with that person. If you're looking for a serious relationship you should be able to overcome obstacles such as that.

Friends, family maybe, any encounters of someone you know. It was much less my personal experience but the experience of others that have convinced me that they leave so much to be desired.
They are factually less because you can't be together in person which, in my opinion, is much better. It is preferred as a whole because it certainly has more value. Though, regarding what someone values in a relationship, mileage may vary.

Distance most definitely shouldn't keep you from being with them but often you hit a dead end and it crashes there, and before you know it, you're looking again. Your case is very fortunate, and that's excellent, but sometimes no matter how much people would want to be together, so much gets in the way of that, and then heartbreak and sadness and everything you don't want is knocking at your door all at once.

To its defense, you focus more on making psychological bonds without being allured by each other's looks and whatnot, which is priceless and the perfect way to find common interests. Other than that, I just find it depressing that we aren't hanging out under the same roof.

Yes, and I believe an LDR can work out if you try. The downside is, of course, that you can't be with your partner often, as in a "normal" relationship.

of course an ldr lacks physical contact which is definitely a big turn off for many people (understandably), however other aspects of an ldr compared with a regular relationship are pretty similar, albeit stronger in psychological areas instead.
ldrs tend to work better when there's a definite end date to the distance and definitely can work out, though it's based on how the participants handle the relationship in the first place, an ldr can be quite emotionally hard to deal with which often leads to a break up.
in the future i think they will be more common and accepted as the internet is slowly becoming even more essential to everyday life than it already is.

Quote: arceustheprime

of course an ldr lacks physical contact which is definitely a big turn off for many people (understandably), however other aspects of an ldr compared with a regular relationship are pretty similar, albeit stronger in psychological areas instead.
ldrs tend to work better when there's a definite end date to the distance and definitely can work out, though it's based on how the participants handle the relationship in the first place, an ldr can be quite emotionally hard to deal with which often leads to a break up.
in the future i think they will be more common and accepted as the internet is slowly becoming even more essential to everyday life than it already is.

basically this

Fun fact: My parents met online, and were in a LDR together! It can work out, and you can be married and have children in the end. But granted they were young adults living on their own at the time, but it still worked out.

So I mean, I'll always be willing to give it a try. But I think it would be hard for me though RIP

It could work, but I'd never do it.

Case by case basis.

I'm not sure it would be for me.

It can work and if you live happily ever after with someone because you started long distance, then it was probably the most fulfilling option you could have went with.

It can work I guess, but I prefer to not be in one. IMO the chance of it working out depends on how far the distance is exactly, and it can't stay long distance forever. Though, I don't consider LDR to be invalid, they're just as valid as any other relationship.

I've been in one for about 3 years now. Still have yet to meet him face to face, but someday..... Things have been great. I love him with all my heart and want nothing more than have a future with him. I mean sure, it sucks not having him there at my side to hug and kiss as much as I want, but I believe that the day will come and until then I'm happy being able to talk with him through chats or skype.

That said, I do believe long distance relationships stand a higher chance of failure than normal ones. It gets hard not having the person there and the two may drift apart and end up finding someone who is. However, it can still work out. If the two are serious and firmly believe in each other and the relationship, then they can get past that and still be together until the time comes when they can truly be together.

I <3 you DragonCamo.

Quote: Bumblebunnii

@ThroneofMalefor How can you have an opinion on something if you haven't been involved with it, was my point.
To say that they have less of a value in general is ridiculous. If your personal experience was bad that's a specific scenario, but to say that in general they're less than typical relationships? That just doesn't make any sense.

Obviously you miss out on a lot. The physical connection is very important in a relationship and you can't keep a long distance relationship going forever. They aren't my ideal choice, but if I met someone I really cared for I wouldn't let something as simple as distance keep me from being with that person. If you're looking for a serious relationship you should be able to overcome obstacles such as that.

You could save up your money so you could actually see them.

Considering my recent personal experience, it definitely doesn't work for me. If booth persons doesn't mind loosing certain things, it can work perfectly.