darkSpyro

CF has requested I make a topic for her. She has reached the maximum number of topics you can make in a day. This is her message,

"I get it, it's ****IN APRIL FOOLS, and everyone wants to have a good time and goof off and be dumb. Hell, that's what I wanna do, that's what I've been wanting to do since the last dS April Fools because it was just so fun.
However, something very, very serious has been brought to my attention and I cannot focus on jokes as much as I wish I could. This is bothering me too much.
What I want to discuss? Well, get ready for a maaaaaajor depression to slap you in the face, my apologies to those who get depressed by this: Suicide. Dealing with suicidal friends, family, ect. Helping people with suicidal thoughts.
Is there a way to help people if you aren't anywhere near them? What if they refuse to listen? What do you do then?

I beg of you, PLEASE do not spam this topic to hell. Please do not make any jokes about suicide here, either. This is serious.
I was originally going to make this topic on April 2nd to avoid the topic getting horribly derailed, spammed, and ignored, but then I realized just how important this is and how it shouldn't be put off for too long."

Suicide, huh?

Alright, well, first off, what do you mean "aren't anywhere near them"? Like, can you still contact them over phone or something or are they out of reach entirely? I'll attempt to answer this part once it gets elaborated on.

If they refuse to listen, I'd just show them how much I cared about them, and how it wouldn't be the same, and if they refuse to listen after that, you just keep trying, keep showing you care.

Suicide for me is never an option.

But some people can't see a way out because depression is a powerful thing, and as hard as you try it keeps pulling you back.

The best advice i can give is listen and be there, because something you say may be the trigger they need to snap them self out of it.

Depression is never a good thing, but also telling someone that what they're feeling is wrong doesn't make it any better.

All you can do is try and guide them towards making a sensible decision, and show them that they aren't alone.

Quote: Cynderfan507

Quote: I-Brawler

Suicide, huh?

Alright, well, first off, what do you mean "aren't anywhere near them"? Like, can you still contact them over phone or something or are they out of reach entirely? I'll attempt to answer this part once it gets elaborated on.

If they refuse to listen, I'd just show them how much I cared about them, and how it wouldn't be the same, and if they refuse to listen after that, you just keep trying, keep showing you care.

The "not anywhere near them": As in distance and stuff. Like you can still talk to them over the phone and stuff, but you're not with them every day.

I've tired to explain how much I care and how much others care. The person... Just doesn't listen. They refuse to accept anyone cares about them, and once I finally drill it into their mind they try to make it seem as though I'm being selfish because I'm "keeping them from ending their pain".

Alright then. Uh, I know that phone calls aren't always the best comfort, though it'd be really the only thing to do from long distance-ish. But for those times when you do see them in person, try to be near them a lot, comforting them, and if you really want to go far you could, like, invite them to a party or something and show how much you and others care. (like, make the party devoted to them, though this is just an example)

If trying to explain still doesn't work, try the type of suggestion stated above, or (you meet them often at school I presume) maybe if you have a class with them to get the teacher to do something special for that class, just for this person, idk, something like that.

I'm not much of a suicide preventing expert but that's what I got, at least for now.

Quote: Cynderfan507

Quote: I-Brawler

Suicide, huh?

Alright, well, first off, what do you mean "aren't anywhere near them"? Like, can you still contact them over phone or something or are they out of reach entirely? I'll attempt to answer this part once it gets elaborated on.

If they refuse to listen, I'd just show them how much I cared about them, and how it wouldn't be the same, and if they refuse to listen after that, you just keep trying, keep showing you care.

The "not anywhere near them": As in distance and stuff. Like you can still talk to them over the phone and stuff, but you're not with them every day.

I've tired to explain how much I care and how much others care. The person... Just doesn't listen. They refuse to accept anyone cares about them, and once I finally drill it into their mind they try to make it seem as though I'm being selfish because I'm "keeping them from ending their pain".

Try Skyping them, if they can see you that might help a little.

Quote: Cynderfan507

Quote: I-Brawler

Suicide, huh?

Alright, well, first off, what do you mean "aren't anywhere near them"? Like, can you still contact them over phone or something or are they out of reach entirely? I'll attempt to answer this part once it gets elaborated on.

If they refuse to listen, I'd just show them how much I cared about them, and how it wouldn't be the same, and if they refuse to listen after that, you just keep trying, keep showing you care.

The "not anywhere near them": As in distance and stuff. Like you can still talk to them over the phone and stuff, but you're not with them every day.

I've tired to explain how much I care and how much others care. The person... Just doesn't listen. They refuse to accept anyone cares about them, and once I finally drill it into their mind they try to make it seem as though I'm being selfish because I'm "keeping them from ending their pain".

Suicide is a hard partner to tango with. Especially when a person is so deep into their suicidal tendencies that it seems nothing can help, and I know how hard it is to deal with that. But I'm going to give you a piece of advice that might seem crazy at first:

You can't.

Now before you say that I'm an asshole for saying this and even people who I helped in the past with their suicidal tendencies might think I'm absolutely bonkers for saying this. And who knows, perhaps what I'm ABOUT to say might not be done all the way through, so I'm gonna bold my main advice so you hopefully can see it.

If you can't reach them, then someone else can try. Find out what state they live in and call the number from this list and take a look at this masterpost and choose something CF might like

I've run into this problem before, and I've learned that being a friend to someone with these tendencies don't work as well as a stranger does. The reason why a stranger works so well is because when we feel horrible about ourselves, we tend to think compliments from friends and family members are just something said to make you feel better. That it isn't real sentiment.

However, if it's said by a stranger and someone you don't know the impact stays there longer. It give hope to that person in distress that maybe they really aren't so bad. That's why when someone is in so deep it feels like you're trying to convince a wall. I don't want you to stress about it, but you can't give up. Haha I know that's a bit of a paradox but you must NEVER give up. Always try and remind that person, even though situations seem dire and again you feel like you conversing with a wall, how much you love them. Ask them every time they get on about how they feel, how was their day, did they do anything fun. Say “good morning!” and “goodnight!” and do kind favors for them. Make sure you send those little reminders every day that you're there for them and that they're loved.

I wish the best of luck <3

This is serious.They are being jerks...Caring is good....Suicide is not

Quote: skylandersspyro

This is serious.They are being jerks...Caring is good....Suicide is not

Who exactly are you talking about?