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Personal Thoughts [STICKY]
Bolt Emerald Sparx Gems: 4502
#43301 Posted: 19:55:39 31/07/2018
i give up. i seriously just give up. im not going to amount to anything, im too much of a useless piece of ****, and everyone hates me and ignores me and no one responds or tries to talk to me. whoa ****, i sound needy as ****. that is probably why everyone hates me. am i too needy to people? i don't know, probably ... but why should i care if no one else does ...

i don't want to do this anymore. im tired. ive lived long enough and experienced ... whatever the **** this **** is. it's not for me. im too weak and too much of a burden to continue. it broke me. are you happy? are you ****ing happy? i might try to sabotage my body so that one morning i just won't wake up.


i don't know, i really don't know ...
---
it's no use crying over lost kittens or spilt milk
I draw stuff.
Greeble Gold Sparx Gems: 2815
#43302 Posted: 00:20:08 01/08/2018
Sun is warm, grass is green.
Sun is warm, grass is green.
---
^ You all know it's true
Sesshomaru75 Platinum Sparx Gems: 5000
#43303 Posted: 05:48:39 01/08/2018
It hurts, but I have to stick to what I said. If I don't, I won't improve. I have a lot to think about for the time being, and how I want to move forward with everything.
I'll probably be bored out of my mind, but that's a sacrifice that I must be able to make for now.


- - -
---
Long live the king!
HeyitsHotDog Emerald Sparx Gems: 4222
#43304 Posted: 16:58:00 01/08/2018
"No matter how scared you are, you should smile to show things will be ok. In this world, the ones always smiling, are the ones who are the strongest."


Edit:


So, once I mention that, you give in and give it to us. Interesting.


And thank you.
---
When ever you get scared or nervous about something, you gotta do your best to keep on smiling and Go Beyond Plus Ultra!
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 17:54:01 01/08/2018 by HeyitsHotDog
willspyro Emerald Sparx Gems: 3916
#43305 Posted: 21:50:59 01/08/2018
Today wasn't so bad besides the fact I had 2 hours of sleep
---
The Slam Dunk™
Get Dunked On™
HeyitsHotDog Emerald Sparx Gems: 4222
#43306 Posted: 00:01:05 02/08/2018
[User Posted Image]

Hoping they come soon.
---
When ever you get scared or nervous about something, you gotta do your best to keep on smiling and Go Beyond Plus Ultra!
Riolu-Blue-247 Platinum Sparx Gems: 6272
#43307 Posted: 05:28:28 02/08/2018
Look, I get it, you think I'm of an age where I should be "independent" and "capable of looking after myself". I agree, and I kind of can but i have literally crippling anxiety involving cooking so rather than just saying "just cook it yourself" to me when I am speaking of being hungry, maybe help out. I'm already bordering on eating issues, and this is not helping. I understand it's hard, and with time I will get better and learn to cook but for now I think I'd rather not risk breaking down and harming myself.
---
I just realised that I might not know what the hell is going on
Project_Unnamed Platinum Sparx Gems: 5967
#43308 Posted: 14:11:16 02/08/2018
This feeling of fear. Well it is good.
---
I might give you more opinions... for a small fee of course.
Bolt Emerald Sparx Gems: 4502
#43309 Posted: 21:13:03 02/08/2018
God I feel absolutely awful for my mum. Her first kid, growing up to be a depressed failure. Her second kid, deadbeat drug addict. She must think she's failed as a parent ... Hope the other two turn out okay, at least.
---
it's no use crying over lost kittens or spilt milk
I draw stuff.
TheJMAN184 Gold Sparx Gems: 2300
#43310 Posted: 10:38:31 03/08/2018
If God is real then why hasn't he kill us all yet. We really are long overdue.
---
DON'T @ ME
HeyitsHotDog Emerald Sparx Gems: 4222
#43311 Posted: 18:43:49 03/08/2018
We've let you stay with us for 5 ****ing months, no pay or anything. Yes, you Gave us $150, but you even resisted to even give us that.


I've given you $900 dollars, and I'm not even sure I've seen $300 of that, it's been so long.


Hell, when our Uncle gave me and my siblings $500 for each of us, you used MY money, to get a gift for the family who took in my HALF BROTHER, WITH OUT MY PERMISSION.


And now, you're taking priority over my half brother's car, over my father and me. WE COULD BE EVICTED, JUST LIKE HAVE HAPPENED TO YOU AND THE FAMILY 6 ****ING MONTHS AGO


And now, when we come to you in need of desperate help, asking for $500, you said yes, then backed out. I am absolutely furious with you more than ever. You've proven to be such a bad mother. It honestly feels like I'm expendable to you, possibly even less loved.


OUT OF YOUR 3 KIDS, I'VE SHOWN MORE SUPPORT AND LOVE FOR YOU AND THIS IS HOW YOU RETURN IT?


We have 12 days and if we're outta here....I might have to get used to not calling you Mom. What you are doing is destroying my positive opinion of you. Possibly even our relationship.


I'm disgusted with you.
---
When ever you get scared or nervous about something, you gotta do your best to keep on smiling and Go Beyond Plus Ultra!
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 18:45:48 03/08/2018 by HeyitsHotDog
DeathOfADream Blue Sparx Gems: 537
#43312 Posted: 04:04:00 04/08/2018
I feel so secure and happy whenever you’re around. Maybe that’s why your absence kinda sucks.
---
”Don't sell your heart, don’t say we're not meant to be
Run, baby, run
Forever we'll be you and me.”
Trix Master 100 Hunter Gems: 5054
#43313 Posted: 05:39:15 04/08/2018
Maybe it's just me, but half of those plans literally sound the ****ing same of "oh replace this with [insert object]" Which ya know doesn't improve ****.
---
乇乂ㄒ尺卂 ㄒ卄丨匚匚

Avatar from CinderLover
kardonis Emerald Sparx Gems: 4380
#43314 Posted: 14:12:27 04/08/2018
I find myself in urgent need of good news
---
My soul's been wandering through time, it's given me this strength of mine, How I am standing here today, is I'm no longer kept at bay
parisruelz12 Hunter Gems: 6181
#43315 Posted: 06:08:10 05/08/2018
so the goodbye song from bear in the big blue house is oddly calming......


the highlight of my day was getting these cards.....thank you. <3
---
looks like ive got some things to do
Metallo Emerald Sparx Gems: 3940
#43316 Posted: 07:16:42 05/08/2018
I love you

But I ust wish I oculd speak to you agai so we could settle this nce anf for all
---
Quote: gary
-laugh evil-
HeyitsHotDog Emerald Sparx Gems: 4222
#43317 Posted: 20:02:00 05/08/2018
I know I can do it. I can live the life I want to live. I can achieve my goals.
---
When ever you get scared or nervous about something, you gotta do your best to keep on smiling and Go Beyond Plus Ultra!
parisruelz12 Hunter Gems: 6181
#43318 Posted: 07:49:27 06/08/2018
im sorry im really annoying



-----------
---
looks like ive got some things to do
HeyitsHotDog Emerald Sparx Gems: 4222
#43319 Posted: 14:22:22 06/08/2018
You're just horrible. The fact that your doing this is horrible. It's disgusting. We need this money, and your playing games. Only giving it to us is if my Dad gives you his laptop. Why the **** are you doing this?
---
When ever you get scared or nervous about something, you gotta do your best to keep on smiling and Go Beyond Plus Ultra!
Bolt Emerald Sparx Gems: 4502
#43320 Posted: 17:24:57 06/08/2018
sorry to anyone who has sent me a message ... im not doing okay right now and it's really hard for me to talk to people one on one when im like this. god i feel awful, im not ignoring you ...
---
it's no use crying over lost kittens or spilt milk
I draw stuff.
Bolt Emerald Sparx Gems: 4502
#43321 Posted: 22:44:25 06/08/2018
can i stop existing now please
---
it's no use crying over lost kittens or spilt milk
I draw stuff.
Bolt Emerald Sparx Gems: 4502
#43322 Posted: 05:47:28 07/08/2018
whoa, today was a ride. i went from a complete low to a complete high.

...

WELP, im having lunch with her on thursday now so that's really made me happy!! like ... the one thing in the world i can be happy about rn, i guess.
---
it's no use crying over lost kittens or spilt milk
I draw stuff.
ZapNorris Emerald Sparx Gems: 4620
#43323 Posted: 06:01:59 07/08/2018
i feel... alone
---
SOCIETY CAN'T JUDGE ME FOR WHAT MY EYES DO
Sesshomaru75 Platinum Sparx Gems: 5000
#43324 Posted: 09:12:14 07/08/2018
The last few days I've admittedly felt like crap, in both the physical and mental aspects of myself. But yet, despite that, I suddenly have had a major boost of confidence and don't really feel ill anymore?
It's weird, so I guess I'll see if it continues tomorrow/later today.

That said, atm I feel like I could take on the world. And I want revenge. > : ) (The last part is in regards to my BF, though not in a serious manner smilie)


Interesting...
---
Long live the king!
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 09:12:56 07/08/2018 by Sesshomaru75
Bolt Emerald Sparx Gems: 4502
#43325 Posted: 07:07:58 08/08/2018
if people want to die ... just let them die.
i don't want to be here anymore. ive lived long enough, experienced everything i want to experience. there's no point to this life, i have no aim, no dreams, nothing to achieve. what's the point of me staying around any longer and just being sad and crying literally everyday? people don't want to see that, i don't want to be that way, and the only way out of it is for me to just ... leave. im a burden on everyone, never going to get anywhere with my life so i'll just continue to be a burden forever, and no one wants to be around me, so please tell me, what the **** is the point in me staying here. just let me die.

i think it's time i try to take fate into my own hands, just to see what happens ... if i die it was meant to be, and if not ... so be it, i'll just be stuck a ****ing sad sack forever and continue to be a burden to everyone.
---
it's no use crying over lost kittens or spilt milk
I draw stuff.
Riolu-Blue-247 Platinum Sparx Gems: 6272
#43326 Posted: 09:29:29 08/08/2018
It wasn't enough. Next time I'll make sure it is. Deeper.
---
I just realised that I might not know what the hell is going on
crystalhero37 Emerald Sparx Gems: 4247
#43327 Posted: 11:07:43 08/08/2018
STOP SAYING THAT SHE'S HORRIBLE AT IT TO EVERYONE. YOU DON'T EVEN SEE HER DRAWINGS. she loves doing it in fact?? she only started to doubt herself when you said that you and her were bad and compared her stuff to me and someone else. maybe you just see yourself in her and that's why you do these weird awful things. just ****ing stop it


- - -
---
mother of pink
GaiaMemories Gold Sparx Gems: 2171
#43328 Posted: 12:16:21 08/08/2018
Stop obsessing you idiot, you just know that will shine through when talking to her.
---
Sorry Chase, a new robot has (temporarily) taken your place!
#ForceOutHate
somePerson Emerald Sparx Gems: 4207
#43329 Posted: 13:49:17 08/08/2018
you honestly wonder if people can grow up past the age of 18
Grizzle Green Sparx Gems: 239
#43330 Posted: 22:22:47 08/08/2018
i really thought we hit it off, why havent you replied? did i **** up? i liked you a lot, there's no way you didnt see them, i guess ill just be miserable and alone forever...
willspyro Emerald Sparx Gems: 3916
#43331 Posted: 22:41:40 08/08/2018
Thighs are on fire
---
The Slam Dunk™
Get Dunked On™
Beemo Yellow Sparx Gems: 1953
#43332 Posted: 01:47:47 09/08/2018
I honestly don’t know how much more I can take. I’m so ****ing close — I’m so ****ing ready to just end it all, but even then, I’m too much of a pussy to do it. Someone kill me, please.
---
Hakuna matata.
somePerson Emerald Sparx Gems: 4207
#43333 Posted: 06:53:50 09/08/2018
making more female friends :)
Riolu-Blue-247 Platinum Sparx Gems: 6272
#43334 Posted: 08:27:52 09/08/2018
Just a week until i have to go. It's hard not to get scared. Just hope it all goes well in the end.
---
I just realised that I might not know what the hell is going on
Trix Master 100 Hunter Gems: 5054
#43335 Posted: 08:51:09 09/08/2018
You're the neediest **** I've ever seen. Compared to me you're also the laziest **** I've ever seen. When Dad tells you, you need to help build a ****ing thing to help benefit you, you're just like "nah man you build it" ***** if you want **** done do it yourself. Haven't you ****ing learned from last time because of Dad raising your bed too high?!

So tired of **** falling from there, hitting my god damn leg and waking me up in the middle of the night. As soon as I can find a job and a pet happy place I'm ****ing out of here. Maybe half of my problems would be gone e.e
---
乇乂ㄒ尺卂 ㄒ卄丨匚匚

Avatar from CinderLover
crystalhero37 Emerald Sparx Gems: 4247
#43336 Posted: 10:14:55 09/08/2018
I'm wasting my time. This is just making me feel worse.

- -

I'm glad I have the friends that I have, and how patient they are with me. I really need to remember that.
You guys help me so much.

- -

Goddamn it feels like I can't even talk about or with people within my own community.
We're going through almost the exact same thing, and you have no idea how much I wanna tell you, but I just can't do it, not now. It's stupid it has to be treated like this, but it's the environment I'm in that isn't the greatest.


:////// icannotwritewellanymore
---
mother of pink
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 14:30:46 09/08/2018 by crystalhero37
ClassicSpyroLUV Yellow Sparx Gems: 1044
#43337 Posted: 16:13:18 09/08/2018
I ended a friendship today, my only one. I did it out of the blue but it needed to be done, and done sooner. God I suck at confrontation. I hope I did the right thing. I hope you can learn and grow from what I said to you, and never say what you said to me ever again. I feel lonely now. Maybe I'm not as anti social as I thought... ****... How I make new friends again? I haven't done that for decades and I was never any good at it. For that matter how do I KEEP friends? I've NEVER done that.
Skyhunter Emerald Sparx Gems: 4854
#43338 Posted: 16:48:47 09/08/2018
Look, I get it. I get that you don't want to get too hyped about something because there's a chance it might not turn out the way you hoped. I get it, we've all been there at some point. But there's a difference between not getting your hopes up so you're not as disappointed, and being a cynical little ***** that goes into things automatically assuming they're going to suck. And I'm not wrong just because I give the benefit of the doubt, and I'd really wish you'd stop trying to push your "everything sucks until proven otherwise" mindset on me.
---
ALL HAIL OUR CETACEAN OVERLORDS!
somePerson Emerald Sparx Gems: 4207
#43339 Posted: 18:20:11 09/08/2018
I don't know why but I've become super social after graduating high school
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 19:21:49 09/08/2018 by somePerson
ClassicSpyroLUV Yellow Sparx Gems: 1044
#43340 Posted: 18:41:17 09/08/2018
Probably because high schoolers suck.
somePerson Emerald Sparx Gems: 4207
#43341 Posted: 19:22:20 09/08/2018
Quote: ClassicSpyroLUV
Probably because high schoolers suck.



yeah probably
Grizzle Green Sparx Gems: 239
#43342 Posted: 21:03:35 09/08/2018
that ****ing hurts

why does everyone leave me i dont get it
Chompy-King257 Gold Sparx Gems: 2093
#43343 Posted: 00:55:41 10/08/2018
Sometimes I feel like the Enclave Communications Officer from Fallout 2
---
”’Demon’ can be an offensive term, refer to them as mortally challenged.”
willspyro Emerald Sparx Gems: 3916
#43344 Posted: 00:57:40 10/08/2018
Thighs are not on fire
---
The Slam Dunk™
Get Dunked On™
Beemo Yellow Sparx Gems: 1953
#43345 Posted: 03:01:14 10/08/2018
Why can't I learn that other people's views on me don't matter?
---
Hakuna matata.
terrafin2299 Gold Sparx Gems: 2970
#43346 Posted: 07:21:13 10/08/2018
Why can I not let go of this site

I have no friends here anymore, and it's not like anyone talks to me, but why do I feel like I need to check in every once in a while? I can't cut this site out of my life and it's toxic.
---
I'm actually not ok
somePerson Emerald Sparx Gems: 4207
#43347 Posted: 12:30:36 10/08/2018
im gonna try to not say retarded anymore and cut out autism jokes from my life
wanderist Platinum Sparx Gems: 6211
#43348 Posted: 17:12:31 10/08/2018
Well. Time to start cursing about my school again because they suck at communication.
---
Oh look, a post
willspyro Emerald Sparx Gems: 3916
#43349 Posted: 07:02:31 11/08/2018
It seems that the transition from middle school to high school is successful. Just got to bypass the sophomore slump.
---
The Slam Dunk™
Get Dunked On™
terrafin2299 Gold Sparx Gems: 2970
#43350 Posted: 04:52:44 12/08/2018
He's dead.... I only met him once and I know he's better than anyone in the family. I still remember him asking me about college and talking about my dad. And he's gone. I'll miss you Uncle Ronnie

the fact most of those people are my friends in that topic and I'm on none of their favorite people on ds lists hurts a little
---
I'm actually not ok
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 15:46:25 12/08/2018 by terrafin2299
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