darkSpyro

So today, my buddy that I pick up on my way to work ended up leaving before the shift even started because he apparently **** his pants in the parking lot; thankfully not in my car. He doesn't want anyone to find out, but I'm an asshole and everyone knows.

If you lay on your back on your bed with your head hanging down, your voice will sound congested and it makes it easier to sound sick over the phone

get your period and feel your cramps rapidly try to kill you as you keel over in pain

If you work at a restaurant:

1. Go to your shift. Say you're not feeling good, you feel nauseous.

2. Go to the bathroom, make yourself throwup. Take picture with phone for evidence.

3. Go to manager and say you just threw up in the bathroom. In the US, by law, they have to send you home for at least 24 hrs.

You could just fake your death for a while.

But realistically, if you really want to try get out of work (But really you shouldn't if it's your job), get 'sick' but make sure to show proof. That's the best way as far as I know.

just like....go play on the motorway