Mine was The Moonstone.
It was really dull and i regret ever starting it.
darkSpyro - Spyro and Skylanders Forum > Stuff and Nonsense > What is the worst book you've ever read?
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Greeble
Emerald Sparx
Gems: 4276
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#1 Posted: 00:03:20 16/09/2017 | Topic Creator
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^ You all know it's true |
Bifrost
Prismatic Sparx
Gems: 10000
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#2 Posted: 00:11:49 16/09/2017
The second Falling Kingdoms book is the most recent one I can remember. Let's build a world full of cool stuff and low fantasy with *some* compelling characters! Let's make all of it worthless and kill pretty much everyone you remotely care about to the point you know the third book is just as pointless since it's a four-logy! That's exactly how A Song of Ice and Fire went, right?
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SO I'LL GIVE YOU WHAT YOU WANT (What I need is never what I want) |
Seiki
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 6072
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#3 Posted: 00:18:06 16/09/2017
twilight
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Once in my dreams, I rose and soared. No matter how I'm knocked around or beaten down, I will stand up restored. |
TheToyNerd
Gold Sparx
Gems: 2137
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#4 Posted: 02:01:05 16/09/2017
Any book
Film is the superior storytelling medium |
Crystal Dragon
Diamond Sparx
Gems: 8850
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#5 Posted: 02:05:39 16/09/2017
fifty shades of grammatical errors
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| King-Pen Krazy Yellow Sparx Gems: 1907 |
#6 Posted: 02:07:06 16/09/2017
Quote: Crystal Dragon
what are some Grammatical errors in that story
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Rise and Shine Ursine |
CAV
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 6253
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#7 Posted: 02:35:34 16/09/2017
Probably not even close to an actual answer but The Count of Monte Christo put me to sleep and I never bothered trying to finish it.
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Iceclaw
Hunter
Gems: 9966
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#8 Posted: 02:40:01 16/09/2017
The 50 shades trilogy
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Twinkies and 2hus |
| Vandal Gold Sparx Gems: 2534 |
#9 Posted: 02:48:48 16/09/2017
Evermore
Whiney sad girl that has powers for .2 seconds of relevance and then nothing else. Also somehow destroys the villain by punching her in the chest and she died cause she couldn't feel love or some stupid crap?? Apparently the rest of the series is about the girl trying to break the curse on her immortal (absolutely totally not a vampire no sir) boyfriend so they could bang. It was like a five to six book series. |
Big Green
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 6345
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#10 Posted: 03:11:58 16/09/2017
Reservation Blues but the worst thing I read on my own was the Eragon books
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Crystal Dragon
Diamond Sparx
Gems: 8850
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#11 Posted: 03:29:50 16/09/2017
Quote: King-Pen Krazy
the whole trilogy is an error |
| parisruelz12 Diamond Sparx Gems: 7569 |
#12 Posted: 04:05:58 16/09/2017
The Young World
I have not seen this much virtue signaling in a book before.
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looks like ive got some things to do... |
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 04:08:27 16/09/2017 by parisruelz12
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Spyro Fanatic
Hunter
Gems: 12108
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#13 Posted: 04:47:43 16/09/2017
The Promise of the Wolves, Inheritance series (stopped reading halfway through Brisingr) and Fire Star.
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DragonCamo
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 6606
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#14 Posted: 06:04:19 16/09/2017
Until They Bring the Streetcars Back
I understand it as all this deep meaning and historical information in it, but it was ****ing stupid
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Gay 4 GARcher |
| parisruelz12 Diamond Sparx Gems: 7569 |
#15 Posted: 07:39:57 16/09/2017
Quote: parisruelz12
i just want to show people how bad this is. A lot of books you read, the author thinks it’s cool have an “unreliable narrator.” To keep you guessing and to acknowledge that there are no absolutes, and everything is relative, or whatever. Which I think is kind of lame. So-just so you know- I am going to be a reliable narrator. Like, totally. You can trust me. First thing about me, I’m not beautiful. i really ****ing hate the female character. (no this isnt an example of the virtue signaling, before anyone asks)
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looks like ive got some things to do... |
emeraldzoroark
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 5375
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#16 Posted: 08:57:16 16/09/2017
Quote: Spyro Fanatic
Wrong. Blah blah opinions.
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Soon. |
| Ice Dragoness Diamond Sparx Gems: 7896 |
#17 Posted: 09:40:33 16/09/2017
The Last Dragon Chronicles series by Chris d'Lacey. I got up to Dark Fire. It's so boring but someone bought a set for a Christmas present so I kinda had to read them. The entire first book is basically about squirrels rather than dragons. After that it just gets to weird it's ridiculous.
"Hey lets introduce invisible aliens that are super dangerous but you can't see them!!!!!!111!". "people r actually polar bears!!1!" "u exist but noot really" and more bull****. Now if anyone suggests dragons go "hrr" I'm like NOPE. |
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Bifrost
Prismatic Sparx
Gems: 10000
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#18 Posted: 11:30:34 16/09/2017
Oh so that's from where that username comes from
Inheritance series is real bad overall, but Eldest was so entertaining it's nowhere as bad as some of the books I had to return. Kinda like a videogame, being boring is worse than being hilariously obsessed with elves.
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SO I'LL GIVE YOU WHAT YOU WANT (What I need is never what I want) |
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Greeble
Emerald Sparx
Gems: 4276
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#19 Posted: 15:06:49 16/09/2017 | Topic Creator
Quote: Seiki
I was tempted, but after seeing the reviews about it being a middle aged woman's fantasies i decided to steer clear.
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^ You all know it's true |
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Seiki
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 6072
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#20 Posted: 15:21:40 16/09/2017
Quote: Greeble
At the height of its popularity, my Dad forced me to read it because I wasn't reading enough according to him and it was something currently popular. Got halfway through the second book before I ended up cheering for Bella to drive off a mountain and gave up. The writing is just really wonky because it spends over half the book in a somewhat stagnant state of Bella being sorta depressed and lovesick over Edward, throws in a little build up and suspense around the halfway point, then goes back to being stagnant for a bit before bum rushing the climax and conclusion in like the last 3 chapters. It makes it so the book is actually pretty damn boring except for the very end. The second one only gets worse about it. It's like the author forgot she needed an actual plot other than a moody teen being in love with a moody vampire until over halfway through the book.
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Once in my dreams, I rose and soared. No matter how I'm knocked around or beaten down, I will stand up restored. |
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Greeble
Emerald Sparx
Gems: 4276
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#21 Posted: 15:25:19 16/09/2017 | Topic Creator
Quote: Seiki
That doesn't sound the kind of thing you want to try and sell to your target audience :/ Teenagers have enough going on without reading a series of books like will most likely make them feel more depressed. It makes me wonder how people like her manage to get published.
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^ You all know it's true |
HeyitsHotDog
Diamond Sparx
Gems: 8226
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#22 Posted: 16:17:27 16/09/2017
I can't read, so I've read no bad books.
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Hey is there anything you want me to bring for the rest of the week and if so it’s so cool that you can do something and just do it like that |
| parisruelz12 Diamond Sparx Gems: 7569 |
#23 Posted: 19:26:26 16/09/2017
Quote: Seiki
i read all four of them. can i just please talk about how jacob "imprints" on a ****ing bABY
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looks like ive got some things to do... |
pankakesparx456
Diamond Sparx
Gems: 7795
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#24 Posted: 19:36:45 16/09/2017
Mockingjay.
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Cool cool. |
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Bifrost
Prismatic Sparx
Gems: 10000
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#25 Posted: 19:40:27 16/09/2017
Quote: parisruelz12
if only the imprinting was the only grossly non okay thing in the fourth book I read some guy's notes on it, it's pretty bad
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SO I'LL GIVE YOU WHAT YOU WANT (What I need is never what I want) |
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Greeble
Emerald Sparx
Gems: 4276
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#26 Posted: 21:14:06 16/09/2017 | Topic Creator
Quote: parisruelz12
I saw that in the film and it made me feel a little sick. Things to do with kids i am not ok with. And she's supposed to be aiming this at a young audience, she must have been seriously out of it when she wrote that part.
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^ You all know it's true |
| parisruelz12 Diamond Sparx Gems: 7569 |
#27 Posted: 21:17:18 16/09/2017
Quote: Greeble
daily reminder that the idea for twilight came to her in a dream
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looks like ive got some things to do... |
84skylanderdude
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 5528
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#28 Posted: 22:13:49 16/09/2017
books are gay
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“No one knows what the outcome will be. So, as much as you can, choose whatever you'll regret the least.” - Levi Ackerman |
Wishblade
Emerald Sparx
Gems: 3262
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#29 Posted: 04:59:03 17/09/2017
Wild Animus. About a man who takes acid and dresses like a goat. Apparently it's based on his true story. A eccentric rich guy wrote, published, and printed it himself. And then he paid people to distribute it and give it out for free.
And the worst part is that he released a cd of accompanying songs.[youtube]Wild Animus Music: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v...-RpGJ773mInxm3i[/youtube]
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Any last wishes? |
Dragons-go-hrr
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 6991
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#30 Posted: 07:17:37 17/09/2017
Quote: Ice Dragoness
Heard u talkin **** JK honestly I haven't touched the books in years and have forgotten like all of the plot tbh, it did get ridiculously over complicated in the last few books, all the alternate identities and timelines were so whack. I mostly just liked it cause the idea of cute lil pottery dragons was neat and I was like 13. tbh I'd change my name if I could, but I don't rly care enough to start a new account.
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"Was it a hot ghost?" |
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Bifrost
Prismatic Sparx
Gems: 10000
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#31 Posted: 11:35:40 17/09/2017
Quote: Wishblade
Well, at least that sounds like a work from the heart; it gets much worse when it's vanity publishing or the author is friends with the company to bypass any editing no matter how much the work needs it. And by that I mean someone needed to cut 150+ pages of Brisingr that did not need to be so flowery.
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SO I'LL GIVE YOU WHAT YOU WANT (What I need is never what I want) |
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emeraldzoroark
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 5375
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#32 Posted: 12:25:00 17/09/2017
I guess liking the Inheritance cycle is an unpopular opinion then.
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Soon. |
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Bifrost
Prismatic Sparx
Gems: 10000
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#33 Posted: 12:53:22 17/09/2017
I don't mind the first two books, I just mean Paolini really likes elves and weapons and the third book gets so preachy it hurts. Worldbuilding was indeed cool, but even that wasn't really around with all the DID YOU KNOW THAT ELVES ARE STRONGER, LIVE LONGER, CAN BE GAY, AND UNDERSTAND THE WORLD BETTER THAN HUMANS? I BET YOU WANT TO BE ONE TOO
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SO I'LL GIVE YOU WHAT YOU WANT (What I need is never what I want) |
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emeraldzoroark
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 5375
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#34 Posted: 13:07:55 17/09/2017
Well, one bad part I remember was the whole relationship with Eragon and Arya
-I love you -I'm like a couple of centuries older -But I'm an elf now -That doesn't excuse the age thing -Screw you Arya pls love me
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Soon. |
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Bifrost
Prismatic Sparx
Gems: 10000
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#35 Posted: 13:29:55 17/09/2017
Which is weird because they constantly talk about how rare it is to have elf kids and how after a certain age they all look nearly the same, so there's no issues that usually come with different age couples(no authority influence for example).
One thing we've all got to agree with tho, is that Eragon's brother has the cooler story. Screw this Star Wars with dragons story, I want to see the meek medieval village resist against armies of bug monsters with wits and hope and then advance to being better at warfare than the century old resistance(I think that was a thing? it gets hazy after the Ra'zac stuff)
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SO I'LL GIVE YOU WHAT YOU WANT (What I need is never what I want) |
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Big Green
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 6345
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#36 Posted: 14:22:13 17/09/2017
I don't like the first two Inheritance books either, they are both boring imo. The first book is Star Wars but mostly traveling, and the second one is Star Wars if Luke trained or traveled the entire time except the end where there's a big fight and that was it. I remember a scene in Eldest where he describes what ants are doing in great detail. I know it's for Eragon's training but I really did not care to read about everything he did while training. As Bifrost points out, Roran's story was a lot more interesting since he did stuff instead of watch ants all day. Nothing happens in Brisingr either and the ending was so dumb I didn't bother reading the last one.
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Bifrost
Prismatic Sparx
Gems: 10000
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#37 Posted: 14:37:29 17/09/2017
Not to mention a bit of a copout.
Sure whatever, dragon soul gems. BUT THE GUY THAT GOT TURNED INTO A SHADE THO. It's a much better cliffhanger to have this new menace show up for the final book instead of getting roflstomped with like 3 lines and then having a drawn out ending chapter about how sad the elf dragon is after his rider did some stupid **** and died.
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SO I'LL GIVE YOU WHAT YOU WANT (What I need is never what I want) |
Edited 1 time - Last edited at 14:38:30 17/09/2017 by Bifrost
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kardonis
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 6366
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#38 Posted: 15:39:13 17/09/2017
Empire of the sun, like, maaaaaaaan. I get that it's your life story or whatever, but I really don't want to read a stupid amount of pages about a poor kid who wanders around japan aimlessly during WWII. This book managed to make WWII boring. I can't even fathom how it's possible.
Book of "you can't say this word", yay for historical fiction beating the fact that white people are horrible into your skull for over 600 pages. Follows the life of a slave girl who was kidnapped from Africa, and basically goes through literally every single bad thing that could have happened to her. It's beyond unpleasant to read and I hated every single page of it. It's basically fifty shades of grey, except instead of bdsm and sex, it's slavery. Completely absurd and offensive. How fitting that a book about being miserable makes the reader miserable too.
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I used to be THE Bowser, now I'm just an awkward girl |
ClassicSpyroLUV
Yellow Sparx
Gems: 1193
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#39 Posted: 05:08:36 18/09/2017
The Imaginarium Emporium by Tanya Huff. It's very adult so read on with caution.
It's about a family of magic users that channel/gain their magic through intercourse with eachother. I'm not even kidding. The book begins with a huge family 'gathering' including elderly aunts and grannies. The elder women of the family are pushing David, one of the most powerful unwed men to marry one of his female relatives to they can properly breed his power back into the family even though he doesn't want to. There's this fear that he's going to turn evil if they don't succeed in 'reigning in' his power. The main protagonist (I forget her name) inherits her grandmother's shop The Imaginarium Emporium. She meets a guy who works for a warlock and they defeat him (I forget what his evil plan was; it doesn't matter) and the girl is the worst kind of person throughout it all. She enchants her friend to tell him things he doesn't want her to know, she marks that same friend with a symbol that says mine (I think she does the same to her boyfriend). When her boyfriend gets mad at her for trying to control him and put enchantments on him she mocks him for feeling 'de-manned' and when he walks away she has her brothers intimidate him. There's more concentrated terribleness in this book but you get the basic idea. She's creepily obsessed with her homosexual friend and there was talk at the start of using magic to change his mind; IDK if that means make him not move away or make him not homosexual but it's awful either way. |
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Greeble
Emerald Sparx
Gems: 4276
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#40 Posted: 20:05:57 18/09/2017 | Topic Creator
Quote: ClassicSpyroLUV
That sounds like what 50 Shades was intended to be, instead of the end result.
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^ You all know it's true |
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Bifrost
Prismatic Sparx
Gems: 10000
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#41 Posted: 20:56:50 18/09/2017
The first half sounds like some edgy supersticious stuff I've heard about over the years, but wow that's nowhere as disturbing as the second part.
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SO I'LL GIVE YOU WHAT YOU WANT (What I need is never what I want) |
Trix Master 100
Diamond Sparx
Gems: 8190
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#42 Posted: 23:30:50 18/09/2017
The books that I believe some nutjob made.
1. About a autistic (they outright state that in the book btw) girl teaching kids "Hey it's okay to touch yourself, as long as you keep it private in your room" 2. How servers are cool and anyone that bullies you about it are just jealous.
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If you cannot handle me at my pumpkin spiciest, you do not deserve me at my pumpkin sweetest icon from Empoh |
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ClassicSpyroLUV
Yellow Sparx
Gems: 1193
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#43 Posted: 04:34:50 19/09/2017
^ What's it called?
The witches from Emporium do a lot of awful stuff on the side, like the elders enchanting gift pies to spy on and control the younger ones, magically tapping phones to eavesdrop, and enchanting people outside the family to do what they want. They make one man retire from his job with no clarification that he could afford to do so or even wanted to and they even talk about outright harming people to get what they want. |
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Greeble
Emerald Sparx
Gems: 4276
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#44 Posted: 20:52:08 19/09/2017 | Topic Creator
Quote: ClassicSpyroLUV
The first one sounds like something a paedo would have written, and they clearly have more going on than Autism :/
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^ You all know it's true |
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TheToyNerd
Gold Sparx
Gems: 2137
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#45 Posted: 20:58:33 19/09/2017
Imaginarium Emporium sounds like something I would write
...as a joke to create the weirdest smut book in existence. |
StormDragon21
Platinum Sparx
Gems: 5550
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#46 Posted: 22:50:38 19/09/2017
Quote: TheToyNerd
I would guess that was probably the reason. If not, then there are very weird people out there.
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"sTORM, my parents just told me something that RUINED MY LIFE. DID YOU KNOW that Smarties have different flavors?!" ~ShadowMewX |
| Blackholes_Wolf Ripto Gems: 10760 |
#47 Posted: 23:11:14 19/09/2017
ready player one, literally twilight for boys
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| DragonDog Ripto Gems: 1798 |
#48 Posted: 23:25:40 19/09/2017
I don't read much. Never have.
I mean I'm starting to find enough crazy crap online I don't need to wind up with a weird book. Imma be honest though all of my older sister's fan fictions are a bore so I stopped reading them. Her original fiction is better but she sticks to fan and it's like. Stop it. It's well written (grammar and wording wise) but. They're all so boring to me. |
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Bifrost
Prismatic Sparx
Gems: 10000
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#49 Posted: 23:44:48 19/09/2017
I like reading because I was always in a place with book avaliables since I was a kid. Being near a book store with people that didn't mind a kid looking through the entire appropriate section meant I read a LOT of **** I don't remember, but I got a true taste for reading when I started to go 'wait, I don't want to read this, it's not well done'.
Then uni decided to suck out a good bit of the joy of reading with the stuff I have to study, which doesn't really count here. A LOT of sexist, racist, pretentious books that I had to read for the first few years and boy did I not want to look at words for a few months. Even now I have a few on the backlog but I take forever to decide it's worth investing on a certain book.
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SO I'LL GIVE YOU WHAT YOU WANT (What I need is never what I want) |
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